Mixtape
by poetryismyfirstlove
Summary: Because every great love story deserves a soundtrack. 1Our Song 2Your Song 3Bulletproof 4Explosions 5When We First Met 6These Words 7Somebody To You 8Build A Girl 9Wanted 10Every Other Time
1. Our Song

**"Our Song"**

AU. Sakura asks Sasuke why they didn't have a song.

.

.

.

**I was riding shotgun  
With my hair undone  
In the front seat of his car  
He's got a one-hand feel  
On the steering wheel  
The other on my heart  
I look around, turn the radio down  
He says, "Baby is something wrong?"  
I say, "Nothing,  
I was just thinking  
How we don't have a song"**

* * *

_._

_._

_._

"Sasuke-kun, don't you think it's time that we should have our song?" Sakura asked her boyfriend of 3 months.

But it would really be more like a year if she would count the time they've started to get closer without officially labeling it. Prior to that they have been friends or like quasi-friends who share a group of friends since they were 5.

.

.

_She had to ask Sasuke what they were after being confused why the boys in their school were avoiding her. And he promptly answered "Hn. And I thought you were smart." _

_"__Hey! What does that mean?!" she replied, affronted. _

_"__Do I carry your books?" "_

_Yes, because you're a gentleman and they're heavy."_

_ "__Do I wait for you and take you home?" _

_"Because my house is on the way to your home anyway."_

_"__Do I call you before you sleep at night?" _

_"Because you have a problem sleeping, right?" _

_"__Do I bring you coffee every morning we have a long exam?" _

_"Yes, because you have this marvelous coffee machine at your house and I really need the caffeine to keep me up for the actual test." _

_"__Do I pay for the movies or the times we go out to eat?" _

_"But I offer to split the bill and you refuse. And It's not like you'll be poor because of it."_

_"__Did I give you flowers last Valentine's day?" _

_"But I also gave you chocolates."_

_"__Did we go to the school dance together?" _

_"You were only avoiding your fangirls and I was the safest choice."_

_"__Do you see me doing these with other girls?" _

_"__Why, were there other girls?!" _

_"__You're more hopeless than the, dobe."_

_"__Now that's just not fair!" _

_ "__Would you say the things I did were things a boyfriend would do for her girlfriend?"_

_"__Uhm...yeah, I guess so."_

_"__You've been my girlfriend the first time I carried your books and took you home. We've had 52 dates. I have held your hand. I went to a dance with you and actually danced. I ate the chocolates you gave me last Valentine's and you know I don't like sweets. I have never given roses to anyone. I've introduced you to my family and I've met your parents. Now, does that answer your question?" Sasuke said, in what was his longest speech as of yet._

_"__How could I have known that? You could have informed me that I have a boyfriend and not find out about it from other boys who said that I was already in a relationship or perhaps courted me like a normal person would. Do you know how embarrassing that was? But no, you have to do everything your way-"_

_Sakura was cut off from her rant by Sasuke's lips. Yep, he's really stubborn not that she minded his methods that much. This kiss was actually brilliant._

.

.

"You should really stop hanging with Yamanaka. She puts too many ideas in your head." Sasuke replied.

"But she and Shikamaru just started going out a month ago and they already have a song." She pouted.

Actually the Nara was just too lazy to ask Ino out so Ino who got tired waiting for him was the one who asked him out instead. And he thought it was troublesome to fight Ino about the song.

"Hn."

"It's okay, Sasuke-kun. We don't need a song." Sakura said as she smiled lovingly at her boyfriend and entwined her hands with his.

.

.

.

* * *

**And he says...**

.**  
**

**Our song is the slamming screen door,**  
**Sneakin' out late, tapping on your window**  
**When we're on the phone and you talk real slow**  
**'cause it's late and your mama don't know**  
**Our song is the way you laugh**  
**The first date: "Man, I didn't kiss her, when I should have"**  
**And when I got home ... 'fore I said amen**  
**Asking God if he could play it again**

* * *

_._

.

.

"Sasuke-kun, you didn't need to copy Taylor Swift's song lyrics."

"Hn."

"I know, I love you too."


	2. Your Song

**"Your Song"**

AU. Sakura sings for Sasuke.

.

.

.

Someone said that when you're in love, all the songs you hear feel as if they were written for you or about you.

But I don't know if Sasuke-kun even likes music.

Do you even listen to music, Sasuke kun?

I love songs but I find it hard to find a music that will suit you. Shall I write you a song Sasuke-kun?

Don't roll your eyes if the lyrics are cheesy or laugh if my voice is a little pitchy. Don't pout if you don't like it either. Just smile for me at the end, won't you?

I swear I'll give it my best.

* * *

.

.

.

**I know it's not much but it's the best I can do**  
**My gift is my song and this one's for you**

**And you can tell everybody this is your song**  
**It may be quite simple but now that it's done**  
**I hope you don't mind**  
**I hope you don't mind**

**that I put down in words**  
**How wonderful life is while you're in the world**

-Elton John, cover by Ellie Goulding

.

.

.

* * *

.

.

.

"Sakura... Thank you."


	3. Bulletproof

**"Bulletproof"**

Canon. Sakura makes a vow to herself while training with Tsunade.

.

.

.

**Been there, done that, messed around**  
**I'm having fun, don't put me down**  
**I'll never let you sweep me off my feet**

**I won't let you in again**  
**The messages I tried to send**  
**My information's just not going in**

**This time baby,**  
**I'll be bulletproof**

-La Roux, cover by Melanie Martinez

* * *

.

.

.

_No matter what, you just always hate me don't you... You remember don't you? When we became genins, the day when our three-man team was first decided...the first time we were here by ourselves, you were so mad at me._

_I don't remember that. I'm different from you all... I can't be following the same path as you guys...Up until now we've done everything as a group but there is something else...I must do...Deep inside my heart, I've already decided on revenge...For that reason only, do I live...I'll never be like you or Naruto_

_Do you really want to go back to being alone? You told me how painful it was to be alone! Right now I know your pain...! I have friends and family...but... if you were to leave...to me... to me... I would be just alone as you..._

_From here on out... we all begin new paths..._

_I...I...love you with all my heart! If you were to stay with me...there would be no regrets... because everyday we'd do something fun, we'd be happy... I swear! I would do anything for you! So... please just stay with me... I'll even help you with your revenge... I don't know what I could do... But I'll try my best to do something... So please... stay with me... or take me with you if you can't stay here..._

_You really are... annoying_

_Don't leave! If you do I'll scream!_

_Sakura... Thank you._

* * *

.

.

.

_I was too annoying that all you do was ignore me. I was useless and pathetic that you and Naruto always had to protect me. I was too weak to stop you. I screamed my heart out that day I confessed my love for you but my words never reached you._

_._

"Sakura, can you still go on?" Tsunade asked her battered apprentice.

"Hai, shisou!" Sakura said as she wiped the blood on the side of her lips.

There was no time to think about the past now if she wanted to be taken seriously. She stood up into a fighting stance once more to continue their training and readjusted her gloves.

"Again." Tsunade ordered, also assuming her stance.

"Shannaro!"

.

_Just wait Sasuke-kun, someday I won't be annoying anymore. I would be useful. I would be strong. I would once again scream my heart out to you and my words will finally reach you. _

_I love you but I would never let you break my heart again._


	4. Explosions

**"Explosions"**

Canon until 699. Post-war.

.

.

.

**I've fallen from grace  
Took a blow to my face  
I've loved and I've lost  
I've loved and I've lost**

**Explosions...on the day you wake up**  
**Needing somebody and you've learned**  
**It's okay to be afraid**  
**But it will never be the same**  
**It will never be the same**

...

**And as the floods move in  
And your body starts to sink  
I was the last thing on your mind  
I know you better than you think  
'Cause it's simple darling, I gave you warning  
Now everything you own is falling from the sky in pieces  
So watch them fall with you, in slow motion  
I pray that you will find peace of mind  
And I'll find you another time...**

\- Ellie Goulding, cover by Jasmine Thompson

* * *

The first time we met, it wasn't the right time.

I wasn't in the right place in my mind. My mind too messed up with my family and with my brother and with revenge then it became more fucked up with the want for power for said revenge.

Then I met Naruto and Sakura and Kakashi and we were team 7. I was okay for a while. It almost felt like I had a family, _almost_ but not quite. Until I met that snake who offered me the power I wanted and revenge for my family that never will be, the one I wanted and the one I lost, was once again my priority. So I took it and left them, breaking whatever bonds we've had.

Sakura tried to stop me. She offered me happiness every day, of never being alone again. But it wasn't being alone that was the problem. I was used to being alone, but loneliness that was what was eating me. Ever since the clan, my family died, I have lost sight of feeling loved.

But maybe I should have given serious thought when she told me she loved me. I let it go as a passing fancy, she'll forget about me soon enough. I thanked her for everything and maybe for nothing, something said in lieu of goodbye. Maybe I thanked her for mistakenly loving me as much as a naive girl could. Either way, I was still loved and it felt good even for just a while but still it wasn't enough.

I had bigger things to accomplish and love was the farthest thing from my mind or maybe everything I did was because I loved too deeply. I loved my clan, my otou-san and my okaa-san, and the murderer who was my aniki. I loved them all, no, I still love them. And it's my love for them that makes me hate Itachi for what he did. I was so consumed with the dead and with my revenge that I don't know how to love the living. It's because I love them too much that I didn't have a space in my heart for a tear-stained girl who selflessly offered her love in the dead of night.

And as I gained power and ultimately my revenge, I also gained regret. Because aniki loved me and I killed him and now I am the last living Uchiha. Truth of the massacre came out and I felt that hate and need for revenge once again. Seems like being an avenger is the only thing I am best at.

So I decided on retribution with Danzo, the elders and Konoha for taking away my clan, my family, my aniki- all the people who loved me. Somewhere, I forgot about the pink-haired girl, even the dobe and the copycat.

Then there came Akatsuki and Madara and Obito. Suddenly I wasn't the last Uchiha again. Then there was the war and all its spoils, Zetsus and Edo Tensei, the Infinite Tsukuyomi, and all this havoc about me and Naruto being reincarnations of long ago rival brothers and fighting a primordial goddess. And finally when all enemies were defeated, when the dead was laid rest again, it was only inevitable that Naruto and I had to settle our own rivalry in epic proportions until I just felt so_ so_ tired of everything that I couldn't even protest when the dobe brought me back to Konoha.

After everything else, there was no more revenge left and I was alone again. I was empty and I felt like a shell of the man I was supposed to be. I had nothing but ruins of the once Uchiha district haunted by ghosts of the past. I was lost until my old team stepped in. I realized that just because bonds were broken doesn't mean they can't be built again. I still have my _almost _but not quite family. I was loved and still loved.

* * *

I served my sentence and worked hard to eventually earn my title as Konoha shinobi. The dobe cried when I wore my old hitai-ate again, scratch mark and all. There were some marks that shouldn't be forgotten. When we applied for the chunin exams for formalities sake, the competition stayed away from us. It was not fair after all to go up against an ex-S class nukenin wielding the Sharingan and a kyuubi vessel capable of senjutsu. After that, getting promoted to jounin was easy enough.

I tried my best in supporting Naruto and his reign as Hokage when Tsunade finally stepped down. It's the least he deserves from me after everything. He would suit the position better anyway. I could admit at least in a small space in my mind that I consider him almost like a brother. That title still belonged to Itachi.

Kakashi was there to keep me grounded even if we don't speak much. He brings me to the cenotaph to stare at names of people long dead. Itachi's name was added by the dobe. Kakashi told me the full story about how he lost his father and his team. He was just as broken as I was and I respect him for having endured it longer. He reminded me that not all that was lost would be forgotten. He was the only one I would consider my sensei.

I have come to know Sai and Yamato as members of team Kakashi, and accepted them or tolerated them in the case of that pale socially challenged replacement who calls me traitor as often as he calls Naruto dickless. Yamato could almost pass for an older cousin or maybe a young uncle and Sai was a very very distant cousin. Naruto was happy that finally our team was complete. Funny how our team was a hodgepodge of orphans with their own idiosyncrasies - a dead-last outcast who became a hero, a stoic retired avenger, an emotional retard, an anomalous genetic experiment and a recluse masked pervert, except for _her_.

Sakura was the most normal out of all of us. She was a first generation ninja, with no clan backing, no bloodline limit or sealed bijuu, no exceptional talent except her chakra control and smarts. Yet somehow, she made it big through her own efforts and with just the tutelage of a Sannin. When you think about it, it would seem as if everything Naruto and I accomplished came by as chance when she had to work for everything she had.

I could never place Sakura very well to what she is to me. She was an ex-fangirl, a teammate, my medic. She's a part of my _almost_ family though I don't think of her as a sister. It didn't feel right. We were hardly even friends to begin with but she was _somebody_. She has proven her worth over and over again. And even if she doesn't say anything, she's still the only girl who has genuinely cared for me without expecting anything in return even if I had attempted to kill her twice. Thinking about it, I would have sorely regretted it if I had succeeded. It didn't feel right to have a world without her.

The Uchiha name was slowly restored and if I wish it, I could continue the clan. Images of a pink-haired girl come to mind. But I know everything is different now. I could not hold her to the promise she made in despair as a girl. I would like to think I have outgrown my selfish ways. It wouldn't be fair to her to offer her a life with no love in it, because I know she deserves it. She deserves more, more than a broken boy with a broken heart even if she'll have me because I still know her. And I deserve less, less than her, a girl with a forgiving heart who wants nothing but to fix and heal me. But if I could love, she'd be the first, no, the only one I could think of. But I don't know how to so I let her go. This was the one selfless act I would do for her that she'll never need to find out.

.

.

.

Years went by. The dobe finally noticed and married the Hyuuga girl. Kakashi the old pervert was still late. Sakura remained single despite advances from other men. I know for a fact that she turned down Lee repeatedly, Naruto, and some other men in Konoha and that rumors say she has also declined the Kazekage. I think it's my fault, either she's still waiting for me or she hasn't yet found someone to replace me. I feel a little guilty about it if not smug. I have decided that I would be the last Uchiha. Nobody deserves the curse of hate in our clan. The world needs to be purged of our tainted blood. I would not propagate just because of sheer obligation or pressure to preserve the Sharingan. And out of a sense of guilt or loyalty or both, I would not hurt Sakura by doing so.

And then a few more years went by. The dobe and the Hyuuga had a son, Hideki and a daughter, Himawari. They named Sakura and I as godparents. Kakashi was much older though his hair never changed color. I have come to conclude that he'll be late for his own death. Tsunade passed away silently in the night. Sakura took it hard. All of the Sannin were now dead and the people now look at us as the new Sannin. Sakura replaced her as head medic as Shizune opted to retire after years of faithfully serving her master to settle down with Iruka, which delighted the dobe. Team Kakashi still keeps in touch once a week at the old Ichiraku ramen stand which was now handled by that old man's daughter. Naruto was the most affected by the old man's passing. I keep busy with missions though I never accepted the offer to join ANBU. I have grown weary of wearing masks, I have yet to shed the one I've worn for years. Instead, I reopened the police force my clan used to run with Naruto's sanction.

And perhaps the biggest news of all, Sakura was marrying Sai. She was pregnant.

Nobody saw it coming. Nobody knew about it. I myself, don't know how to feel about it. I should be happy for her because she's finally moving on but somehow I can't bring myself to. So I don't say anything despite the many well wishers. Sakura knows me enough to know not to expect anything from me and I've never really been close to Sai.

Naruto was speaking with Sakura in his office privately, which I just happened to overhear as I was on my way to visit the dobe. Still, I masked my chakra. He was asking her why Sai and if she was marrying him for the right reasons. Sakura was silent for a while perhaps contemplating her answer before she spoke.

"You and Sasuke-kun are busy most of the time so Sai and I got to spend more time together. You do know that I've been helping him understand feelings and how to socialize better, right? One day, he asked me what it means if a girl always comes to his mind before he sleeps and when he wakes up and if his hearts beat fast when he is with that person so I told him it was probably a crush. Then he asked me what it means if he worries for that person's safety and when he always wants to see that person happy so I told him that it wasn't just a crush anymore and that he truly cares for that person. Then he asked me what it means if he wants to spend more time with that girl doing nothing and everything so I asked him who was he in love with. He answered 'Isn't it still obvious, ugly?' I punched him because he called me ugly again before I kissed him."

I could hear Naruto's snickers. "Ne, Sakura-chan, what about Sasuke-teme?" he asked seriously this time. I snapped to attention when I heard the dobe say my name. I heard Sakura give a deep sigh.

"I waited, Naruto, and waiting was hard when you know the other person doesn't feel the same way. I tried to forget him and move on but I couldn't so I thought I could be like shisou and stay single and alone when I couldn't be with the man I loved but it gets a bit lonely sometimes. Even you have moved on and I guess Sai wore me down. He makes me feel loved, not that you didn't make me feel that way, but he's new and awkward at this yet he tries so hard to make me happy. He has been amazingly attentive knowing my quirks, listening and talking to me. He waits for me after my shifts, cooks and cleans for me. He even reads books about how to be a perfect boyfriend. I love him but I'm not in love with him, and I think Sai knows, but maybe I'll learn how to. I'm not using him to replace Sasuke-kun because Sasuke-kun will always be special to me. But now I'll be a mother and have another precious person in my life. I'm marrying Sai because he also deserves to be happy. He's just like you, you know, he never grew up with a family and I don't want to deprive him of that."

I walked away discretely, pretending I didn't hear a thing about their conversation. It wasn't until the dobe and I met again that I realized he asked that question because he knew I was listening in. What could I have done about it? Did he expect me to stop the wedding? Sakura was free to do as she wants.

* * *

When Sakura underwent labor, Sai was out on a mission with Yamato. Naruto, Kakashi and I were there and so were her parents. Sai and Yamato came late but were just in time for the delivery. She delivered to a healthy 7 pound baby boy. His name was Haruno Shin after Sai's dead brother. Since Sai didn't have a last name, he was made a Haruno instead.

I watched Sakura, carry the child in her arms with a warm gentle smile on her face. Everyone else was cooing how beautiful the baby was. As Sakura let each of us hold the baby, I was able to see he had black hair but his eyes, they were just like hers.

I imagine a time when I could have been the one sitting beside her stroking the baby's head, feeling awe and happiness and anxiety at the same time. But this was not that time and I was not that man. Sai was. For the first time in my life, I felt as if I was cheated out of something. As if I missed my fate and got replaced. And what took Sai a few years to learn, took me 18 long years. I was in love with Haruno Sakura too little too late.

.

.

.

Naruto would have another son, Minato, who was his mini-me. Kakashi sensei disappeared after requesting for a mission when he complained he was getting bored of retirement. Naruto contemplated whether he was just late to return or MIA but after a year with no word we assumed the worst. We'd joke about it sometimes saying Kakashi never wanted anyone to see what his face looked like but we were all grieving his absence. He would be sorely missed. He was a great shinobi and sensei, the closest I had to a father figure. Sakura and Sai had another son, Aoi, who looked exactly like him and a daughter, Misaki, who was Sakura's replica.

I would forever remain the last Uchiha. I am praying that my whole clan would understand why. No one would measure up to the woman I loved too late and no child would be loved as much as I loved hers. It was surprising that her children especially her daughter liked me more than the dobe but I guess like mother like daughter. They all inherited their mother's chakra control and in my free time, I would help them in their training. I was content to at least have a small part in their lives. I think of Shin as the son I could have had. He was smart as his mother, with good reflexes, excelled in taijutsu and had a knack for medical jutsu. He also had fire affinity so I taught him my family's katon. I was so proud when he performed the goukakyuu no jutsu after just a week of practice. Aoi was meek and quiet. He would inherit his father's gift for the arts and incredibly had lightning affinity. I taught him the chidori just as I have learned from Kakashi. It was amazing when he learned to incorporate lightning in his drawings. And little cheerful Misaki who was not so little anymore had the best chakra control and would inherit her mother's inhuman strength. She also had dead aim with shuriken and kunai and added with her chakra control was terrifying with wire techniques. She was interested in learning how to use a katana so I taught her. When she passed her chunnin exams, I gave her my Kusanagi.

I could never truly hate Sai, after all he has made her happy. He has given her what I couldn't.

* * *

The ill-effects of my early years pushing myself too much and the strain of the Sharingan took its toll on my body and mind and aging only seems to have worsened it. I would often have panic attacks, night terrors and memory lapses. Only Sakura's herbal teas and chakra treatments kept me relatively well.

I have retired as a shinobi and head of police. I stayed at home and Naruto and Sakura would keep me company. Sai and Hinata visited with them too sometimes along with their children. I knew Sai has become aware over the years that I was in love with his wife but he has never spoken to me about it. I guess he has learned tact or perhaps if we spoke about it we would both be acknowledging it was real.

I was slowly losing my mind and who I am. Everytime I would come to, I would see darker bags under Sakura's eyes. She doesn't smile much anymore. Despite the wrinkle lines and her pink hair which has gone paler by the day, her green eyes remained the same. Time has matured her with grace and she's as beautiful as I remember her.

Sai visited me alone once during my lucid state and told me stories of team seven when I was away. I allowed him to speak freely, listening to things about Sakura and Naruto. And before he left he told me.

"Tell her. You owe her that much."

"It wouldn't change anything." I told him.

"Yes, it would. She deserves to know. It would give both of you closure."

"Since when had you been good at understanding feelings?" I asked him.

"Since I loved her knowing she will always love you more than me." He answered. "I'm not doing this for you but for her. This is me being selfish. I was lucky enough to have her and the children but she loved you first, and that's a part of her heart I will never have."

"I would like to say I'm sorry but I'm not." I said honestly. There was no point in lying when you're going to be dead anyways.

"I have expected you wouldn't be. And I'm not sorry too, though sometimes I think if I weren't here then the both of you could have found your way to each other eventually."

"Perhaps but it's not worth dwelling about now. I know I called you a replacement before but I don't think you are." It was the closest to apology I could give.

"I know but we both know why." Because I could never replace you goes unsaid. "I have considered myself a filler. I filled in a spot on a team that was missing a member. I filled in for Naruto for a comrade that wasn't there to trade insults and spar with. I filled in the void in Sakura's heart that wants the love of a man she couldn't have. I filled in for _you_. I have come to terms that Naruto and Sakura would always think of you first but they have been generous to include me in their lives. I know Sakura loves me in her own way. I could not ask for more than that. She has given me a life I have never dreamed of."

I don't know what to tell Sai after that. "Thank you... for loving her."

"You shouldn't be thanking me. I should be thanking you. Because if things didn't happen the way they did then I wouldn't even be here."

"Next time, I'm not letting her go." I challenged him with a smirk.

"So you say." He replied with that false cheery smile as he left.

.

.

.

It was several weeks after. I've become bed-ridden since my body has stopped producing chakra. Everyday, I was getting worse, the periods lasting longer and longer with few lucid states in between. Sakura would not leave my side to take care of my needs as Sai took care of their home and grown-up children. The dobe would come every night to visit. I silently thank Sai for letting me spend my remaining days with her.

I feel that my days are numbered and I'm just waiting for my last breath. Sakura would sleep beside me, worried and anticipating my needs. Sometimes I'd stay awake and watch her sleep, imagining a life that could have been. And as she sleeps I tell her I love her and that I wish I could have been a different man, a better man and that her children were ours and that this was just another day out of the many years we've been together of her and me sleeping in our bed, not her attending to a dying man who was wishing for things he couldn't have.

In the morning, I opened my eyes to green eyes looking at me, pink hair spilling on the pillows. She smiles softly holding my hand close to her heart. Her tears start to gather at the corner of her eyes. I get the feeling that it was time and I was thankful to see her one last time.

"Sakura... thank you... I'm... sorry..."

"Sshh... you don't have to say anything. I already know. You're remarkably talkative today Sasuke-kun." She tried to joke as she bit back a sob.

"I... I lo..." she cut me before I could finish.

"Please please don't finish it. This is hard enough as it is. I don't need the words Sasuke-kun. If you say what I think you're going to say, I'll breakdown and it wouldn't be pretty. I'm barely hanging on as it is, so please don't." She pleaded, holding back her tears.

I nodded. "Would it... be okay... if I... asked you... to love me... another time?"

She smiled despite her tears. "Sasuke-kun, you don't even have to ask, because truthfully I don't know how to stop. I love you so much it hurts. I love you. I will always love you."

It felt good to hear those words again even near the end. After all this time, after all I've done, after all she has suffered because of me. She loves me _always_.

"When that time comes, promise you would tell me then?" She asked, her green eyes imploring.

I feel my eyes get heavy, images of pink and green blur to white. When all goes well and I am no longer the revenge-obsessed broken boy, when I grow up to become a man who knows how to love, when a pink-haired girl with bright green eyes would confess her love in the quiet void of night, I would know better not to leave her with a thank you then knock her out unconscious on a stone bench.

I feel a soft brush on my lips, a kiss, our first and last.

I smile, I think, looking forward to another time.

* * *

**I'll love you, another time...**

* * *

.

.

.

List of other names used and their meanings:

Hideki - hide- excellence, esteem + ki- tree

Himawari - sunflower

Shin - true/real

Aoi - hollyhock, althea, blue

Misaki - mi- beautiful + saki- blossom

Sequel: **Another Time**


	5. When We First Met

**"When We First Met"**

AU Nonmassacre. Sasuke and Sakura meet under different circumstances and the years afterwards.

.

.

.

**When we first met  
Your hair was long and brown  
You hadn't yet cut it all off**

* * *

I was a withdrawn kid growing up and mostly kept to myself. Unheard of since I was an Uchiha, more known for our stoic appearance and superiority in everything we do. But I was always overshadowed by Itachi-niisan.

Anything I did he did first and better. I am 8 and still in the academy when Itachi had already graduated at my age. What else was I to do when I had nothing to make my otou-san proud of? Even my teachers at the academy tell me that the things I do are only to be expected of Itachi's otouto.

I don't hate Itachi though because he's the best big brother there is, but for once I want to be better at something than him. I want to be recognized for me, Sasuke, not because I'm an Uchiha and not because I'm Itachi's otouto.

I was trying to practice my kunai and shuriken throwing secretly in one of the lesser used training grounds bordering the forest. I hit the bull's eye everytime when I use stationary targets but I have a problem when it comes to throwing at moving targets. It was frustrating and tiring and I was just about to quit when someone spoke behind me.

"You're doing it wrong."

I was startled and quite ashamed of myself for not sensing someone sneaking up on me. Either she, because the voice was definitely a girl's, was good at stealth or was a fangirl stalking me. I turned around and saw the other quiet student in class, Sakura no last name.

Most tease her for her larger than normal forehead but I guess it couldn't be helped because she's also the smartest in the class, maybe not as smart as Nara though I couldn't be sure because that boy is just too lazy to even try. While I may be the top student with good grades all-around, she aces all the written exams and has excellent chakra control. Even Itachi was impressed with her. Her only weakness was the physical exams but she was catching up already.

She was found outside village gates when she was about 4 years old wandering and lost with no memory of who she was and where she came from. She was taken into custody by the village to be assessed by a Yamanaka but her mind seemed to have a block. All they found out was that her name was _Sakura. _Her past was a mystery and no other village has claimed her thus far.

Like most orphans, she was kept in the orphanage until it was found out that she had photographic memory and perfect chakra control. She was later on enrolled in the shinobi academy and became a protege of _the_ Senju Tsunade to be trained for medical jutsu in the future.

She was an oddity to me the first time I saw her in class when we were five. She was and is the only person I know who had pink hair much like her namesake and her eyes were green like spring. She was seated in front of me but we've never spoken to each other again since that first day she greeted me and introduced herself. Later on, I found it annoying how I would always end up getting distracted by her pink hair.

She kept to herself, often found in the library or at the hospital helping out. She doesn't have friends either except maybe for that other quiet girl, Hyuuga who would sit with her during lunch time or that Yamanaka girl who I would see with her picking flowers and herbs on the weekends.

"Tch, annoying. How would you know? Have you been able to hit a moving target before?" I asked, quite offended. I guess she wasn't a fangirl because who was brave enough to tell an Uchiha that? Or maybe because she grew up with the Senju that she thinks she is equal to an Uchiha.

"Gomen, I didn't mean to offend you. I just came from picking some herbs when I saw you and I just wanted to help. Theoretically I could hit the target, but I still lack the physical skill to do that. If you want I could help you with your calculations then maybe you could help me improve my physical conditioning." She offered.

I thought about it and saw that it would benefit us plus she wasn't a fangirl which was a major deciding factor to me and maybe she could also help me with my chakra control.

"Aa. But we keep this a secret." After all, Uchihas and Senjus weren't known to socialize since the days of Madara and Hashirama. Both were already dead but they have passed on their stubbornness to their descendants.

"If that's what you want." She conceded. "You can call me Sakura."

"Sasuke."

And that's how we started as training partners. I've been able to perfect my shuriken and kunai throwing with her guidance while I helped her with her taijutsu. She also taught me some chakra control exercises like tree climbing and I've managed to perform the great fireball jutsu with much success that my otou-san was able to praise me for the good work. All in all, my grades have improved since we started hanging out after class and she has also upped her stamina and speed.

It was only a matter of time when we eventually became friends because really, it was just natural if you put two loners together. I had someone who favored me more than Itachi and she had someone to celebrate her self-appointed birthdays with when the sakura trees bloom.

And through the years I've watched that pink hair grow longer. Tch. It was still annoying.

.

.

.

By the time we graduated from the academy at 12, Sakura and I were put in the same genin team with Namikaze Naruto.

Now I don't really mind being in a team with the dobe if he wasn't such a dobe. He was the Hokage's son and my okaa-san was close to his mother but we've never really been close friends despite the dobe thinking otherwise. He didn't take things seriously, failing exams and playing pranks, and wore a lot of orange and was loud for a ninja like he hasn't even heard of stealth. But every team after all needed someone to take all the hits and Naruto had great stamina and lots of chakra to serve the purpose.

If only he wouldn't try to take Sakura's attention from me. For the longest time he had been asking Sakura out on dates. Not that I want to date her myself, Uchihas don't dawdle with such mundane practices. But I've been used to being her only boy _friend _and having her attention to myself. Sakura is just too nice sometimes even to the dobe. I blame the Senju.

"Introduce yourself, your likes, dislikes, hobbies and dreams." Hatake Kakashi-sensei said.

"Why don't you go first Kakashi-niisan?" Naruto said excitedly.

"Ne, Naruto, even if we've known each other for a long time, as of now I'm your jounin instructor hence you should call me sensei. " Kakashi chided lightly.

"He he... gomen, sensei." Naruto apologized sheepishly.

"I am Hatake Kakashi, my likes... dislikes...hmm...I have many hobbies and my dream... I can't tell you yet." He finished.

"But we didn't learn anything about you sensei!" Sakura pouted, crossing her arms.

"Kawaii! My student is just too cute." Kakashi said, eyes crinkled in a smile, ruffling Sakura's hair which was annoyingly the first of many. I guess I would also have to look out for Kakashi-sensei stealing her attention from me.

"I am Namikaze Naruto. I like ramen especially from Ichiraku's because it is the best ramen ever and learning new jutsu. I dislike waiting for ramen to cook and Sasuke-teme because he hoards Sakura-chan to himself. I enjoy pulling pranks and not getting caught, spending time with otou-san and okaa-san and meeting new people. My dream is to be the best Hokage ever so people will recognize me as more than just my father's son!" the dobe said.

Hn. So maybe we have almost the same dream. But still, if I could find someone else to pay him attention then he would leave Sakura alone.

"I am Sakura. I don't have a last name. I like learning medical jutsu from Tsunade-shisou, doing ikebana with Ino and origami with Hinata and being friends with Sasuke-kun. I dislike people who tease me or think less of me. My hobbies are reading books, helping Shizune-neesan at the hospital and training with Sasuke-kun. My dreams are to be head medic, to have a family of my own someday and to help Sasuke-kun achieve his dreams" she said passionately. "and Naruto too." she added, smiling at Naruto who was smiling widely his face would split.

I felt my heart swell and my lips turned up in a small smile even if she mentioned the dobe too. I didn't know she thought of me that much to include me in her dreams. But her wanting to have a family is something I haven't considered. Of course she would want to since she was an orphan but thinking about her with her own family bothered me.

"Hn, Uchiha Sasuke. I have a few likes and there are many things I dislike. My hobbies are studying new jutsu and training with aniki and Sakura. I don't have a dream but rather a goal... that is to stand under my own light and be recognized for my own achievements."

That's how team seven started before our team became a legend. Before all the cool jutsus like chidori and rasengan, before Sakura could smash boulders with just a pinky and heal like no other, before Naruto and I finally became rival and bestfriends, before I had awakened my Sharingan, before Kakashi-sensei and his infamous bell test.

.

.

.

And then there was that other period in team seven, the dark ages as Naruto would call it or what Sakura would tease me as the time when Sasuke-kun was stupid. It was during our first chunnin exams at the forest of death when I received the cursed seal from Orochimaru, when Sakura cut off her hair to fight off those damn Oto nins, when I got lost in power and Sakura stopped me, when I got jealous of Naruto having more power and protecting Sakura when I couldn't when Oto tried to invade Konoha, when Naruto and I fought at the top of the hospital and almost hit Sakura with the chidori and rasengan.

It was when I contemplated betraying my family, friends and village to follow Orochimaru because I needed power to be better than Itachi and especially better than the dobe. I needed power because Sakura didn't have to cut her hair if I had been stronger.

Sakura had unexpectedly been there near the village exit and stopped me from making a bad decision. Because following a criminal would make me powerful but a traitor to my village and it will not make me better than Itachi or Naruto. Because taking shortcuts is not a Sasuke-kun thing to do. Because I may not be a prodigy like Itachi but I have always worked hard to achieve my goals and dreams. Because leaving my home, family and friends for power will take me down a lonely road and if our paths ever cross again we won't be friends anymore but enemies.

"You really are... annoying." Why is it that she was always there to point out my weakness?

"If you insist to leave then you are not the Sasuke-kun I know. You are not my Sasuke-kun. As much as I love you, this is the one thing I cannot help you with." Her voice breaking as she cried.

That she _loves_ me is what I'll remember most from that night. What caught my attention more than anything else; more than being a traitor and not being better than Naruto or Itachi, more than being enemies when our paths cross again. That she knows me and loves me and I am _her_ Sasuke-kun felt like I was better than Itachi and definitely Naruto, already. Because Sakura has accepted me for who I am.

And when I turned back, I hugged her for all she's worth, for all these feelings I don't know how to express and for all the times she had always been there. "Sakura...thank you."

It wasn't enough but I hoped she understood what I meant. She breathes a sigh of relief. "Just don't think of ever leaving me alone again."

It was at this moment I realized that I had been so close to doing just that. Up to this day, I don't know what I would have become had I not listened to her, what would our future would have been like? I think of a different time and a different me and a different Sakura and I don't like what I imagine. I hope that other Sasuke wasn't that stupid. I pulled back from hugging her to look at her.

"Aa." I promised.

She smiles through her tears, the smile she has always given me.

.

.

.

* * *

**And now it's long once again, oh  
Oh, it's long once again**

* * *

.

.

.

We were 13, when Naruto and I had to leave for our training with Master Jiraiya and Kakashi-sensei respectively. In light of the recent events, it was decided that we train separately for our own protection as Orochimaru was still after me and some rogue nin were after Naruto being the Hokage's son. Unfortunately, Sakura had to stay at Konoha with her Tsunade-shisou for her own training.

I don't know how to tell her goodbye because I was coming back anyway. We have never again spoken of what she told me that day I almost betrayed Konoha but I did know what I wanted her to do for me, in case some idiot had the gall to try anything. Because I am not as oblivious as people think I am.

I caressed her cheek touching the edges of her hair, drinking in the sight of her, thinking long hair suited her better. I vowed silently that I'll train hard so I could protect her the way I want to but then she surprised me with what she said.

"It's just hair Sasuke-kun. It would grow eventually but I'd cut it all off again if it means I could protect you."

"I'm not breaking my promise. I'll be back." I whispered as she hugged me for the last time in what would be a few years. She nodded her head once meaning she understood what I really meant. _Wait for me_.

As we crossed the gates of Konoha, I turned around with my Sharingan on to memorize the way she looked to keep me company for the long time ahead, and noted that she smiled that smile I have claimed to be mine.

.

.

.

It was a good three years of training, and I have learned a lot on the road, improving my Sharingan, copying and practicing jutsus, learning how to wield a katana, perfecting the chidori and making up my own jutsu.

We were heading home to Konoha, back to my family, and back to Sakura. I wonder how long her hair was now or if she cut it again. My own hair has grown longer as well.

As the gates of Konoha came to view, the first person I saw was the dobe waiting for me. Naruto matured as well, physically that is. No longer the runt he was, he was now as tall as me and looked more like the Yondaime.

"Teme! I just arrived a little less than an hour ago and I knew you were also coming back today. Want to go find Sakura-chan so we could all go to Ichiraku's?"

"Hn." As if I wanted to share Sakura with him and eat ramen the first time I return. I turned to Kakashi-sensei and he just nodded, granting me permission. I teleported to the hospital, knowing her schedule from the letters she'd send me before Naruto could say more.

I arrived at the hospital lobby, in search of pink hair. I flashed my chakra and waited. I felt her presence behind me before she could speak up. "Sasuke-kun."

I turned around and saw her for the first time in 3 years. She was taller, more womanly than girlish, her hair down her shoulder blades and still pink and shiny and smooth.

"Sakura." I greeted back and she smiled that smile that belonged to me.

We were 16 and definitely older but it had been 3 years spent apart so we went through the stage of getting to know each other again. It was an awkward but necessary process. We had to adjust to the changes in each other. I was more aware now that she was a girl, no, a young woman and that I was not above staring.

We talked, her mostly of what happened when I was gone that she hasn't included in her letters. I only wrote to her to inform her if we've moved to a new location but I sent her trinkets from my travels.

She told me about Yamanaka and Nara getting together and of this boy, Sai, whom she met on a mission under Yamato-taichou who looked like me but smiled falsely and loved to draw and always called her ugly.

I wasn't pleased to be only hearing about this now and scowled. Sakura must have seen it and assured me that Sai didn't really mean it. He only did it because he read it in a book that one should give names the opposite of what they really think.

I had more reason to hunt this Sai, so he thinks Sakura is beautiful and went about complimenting her in a backwards kind of way. Sakura said it was just Sai being friendly and he meant no harm.

Days pass and we fell into routine again. We ate and took long walks, trained and took missions together and finally finally passed that damn chunnin exam together. I have also succeeded at last to foist Naruto's attention at Sakura's friend, Hinata, the quiet Hyuga girl who (un)fortunately and incidentally had a crush on the dobe.

I had never been more sure of what I had known when Sakura stopped me from leaving, that despite how much stronger I have become and would become; I would always have a weakness.

.

.

.

* * *

**As I kept track of every haircut that we ever had  
I could, I could see how long it had been, oh  
Oh, how long it had been**

**And this thought, made it clearer**  
**I ought to be near her**

* * *

.

.

.

We were 18, jounins and ANBU hopefuls, when we had our first fight. Sakura was escorting the Kazekage's children when they visited from Suna for a diplomatic meeting. It was quite obvious to me that Gaara had taken a liking to her despite his stoic appearance. I should know.

However, Sakura was oblivious and kept insisting that Gaara just wanted to be friends and that the invitation to visit Suna was just for training other medic nins and that the only reason he held her hand was to assist her when she tripped. I told her that she shouldn't be so nice lest he thinks she's interested in being more and it was improper behaviour for kunoichi to fraternize with foreign ninja. That was when she blew up at me.

"Sasuke-kun, Gaara is from Suna who we are allies with, so fraternizing is deemed acceptable. This is a task the Hokage has assigned to me specifically and if you have a problem with it then you should take it out on him. And if ever you were insinuating that I was flirting with him, so what!? It's not as if it's your business anyway." She replied hotly.

None of my business? The nerve! "How could it not be my business when he is taking liberties at you?"

"Really, Sasuke-kun, when have you been delegated to defending my honor?" She asked me, openly.

It goes without saying, shouldn't it? I wasn't just imagining all our time together was I? She was the one who told me she loved me. Has her feelings changed since then? I furrowed my brows not quite sure how to answer. "Hn."

"Sometimes, Sasuke-kun, I wish you'd just tell me what you actually want to say and not have me interpret your grunts for you. Come find me when you know the answer." she said, before leaving in a swirl of sakura petals.

.

.

.

I was venting all my frustrations at the training ground when Kakashi-sensei came upon me. "Mou, Sasuke-kun, stop mauling the innocent trees. Yamato will have to replace them again."

"Hn."

"You can't blame her you know. She hasn't been approached by any Konoha male because of you but I don't think foreign nin especially someone like Gaara will give you the same deference. It's easy to see that Sakura is a good catch and I know you've known that for a long time now. Question is why haven't you done anything about it?"

"I didn't think I had to. I thought she knew." I mumbled.

"Sasuke-kun, you still have much to learn about women. They always want you to talk to them to say what you feel. Just because she may have had feelings for you doesn't mean she'll wait around forever. If you don't ask her out exclusively then she could say yes to anyone who asks her before you. She's not truly yours until you stake your claim." Kakashi-sensei said before he left me to my musings.

And so I have come to realize that I have been taking Sakura for granted. That she deserved much more from me. That I should man up and tell her exactly what I feel.

I found Sakura at her house, her hair newly cut up to her shoulders.

"I just wanted some change. Sasuke-kun." She said before I could even ask.

"Aa." I answered back. I was disappointed to be the reason she cut her hair once again and this time it was because she was angry at me but I hoped she was ready for the change I wanted.

"So have you thought about what you wanted to say?"

"Go out with me, everyday until people understand that you are mine. Stay with me, through good times and in bad. Be with me, now and always."

"But why Sasuke-kun?" she asked with her brows raised, green eyes piercing mine.

I think back to that time when she first told me she loved me.

"I have been helplessly in love with you since the moment you first told me you loved me, maybe even way before that. You had been there from the start, lending me your help, patiently teaching me and training with me. You were always there to listen the rare moments that I talk, to comfort and cheer me on even if I don't ask for it. You know when to fill in the silences and when to just let it be. You were my friend first then teammate. You support my dreams like they were your own but know when to stop me from taking the wrong path. _You know me_. You have always seen me for me, not Uchiha Sasuke but just _Sasuke_."

"To me, you would always be Sasuke-kun. I love you, always have and always will. I think I have known it since the first time I saw you but I was too shy to approach you. It has only grown the more time we spent together. Even if I don't know where I came from or have a last name, I feel as if I have always been meant to love you."

We were 18 when I answered her confession from when we were 12 and confessed my feelings back, when I pulled her to me and kissed her for all she's worth and she kissed me back equally as fervent.

We were 18 when I told myself that I had been an idiot for wasting so much time that we could have been doing this instead.

.

.

.

We were 20, when I was promoted ANBU captain and Sakura would become the head medic upon Tsunade's retirement. She had made one of her dreams come true and I was finally out of Itachi's shadow. Even Naruto was halfway to his dream, spending time attending meetings and going on diplomatic visits with his father.

We were 20, when Sakura fulfilled my dirty dreams. Because contrary to popular belief, Uchihas are not asexual, at least not this Uchiha.

We were out sparring as usual. It was so hot that day like the rest of the previous days before it. Konoha summer was starting to feel like Suna and it wasn't helping that Sakura was only wearing a mesh shirt over her bindings, having removed her top due to the heat. It wasn't as if she's not flustered as well when I removed my shirt.

We weren't getting anywhere with our training with the both of us distracted. Sakura and I have had a lot of practice with foreplay but never with the actual thing. We talked about it before and we had been waiting for that moment when _it_ would just feel natural. Just then it suddenly rained. Huge drops that were unrelenting and so we had to take cover. Her apartment was nearer so we hurried there.

We arrived, drenched, cold and shivering. She went to the bathroom to change while handing me a set of my clothes I would leave with her when I'm too tired to go home after training. She came out wearing a big loose shirt just above her knees.

She was running a towel on her hair which was now halfway down her back. She sat on the bed and I sat beside her and took the towel from her hands. "Here, let me help you."

I was getting distracted being this close to her, seeing a large expanse of smooth fair skin when her shirt rode up to her thighs when she sat down, with her hair smelling like rain and of her.

I guess somehow she sensed it too.

She turned around to face me while I dropped the towel. I moved closer to her with our lips almost touching, my eyes boring into hers, my hands on her waist and on her nape pulling her to me.

The first touch of our lips felt electric like a spark of chidori. Then the spark became fire driving us closer together, feeding from the hunger that was burning inside me.

We fell into the bed, twisted on each other, our desire seeping and fanning the flames into a blaze that's threatening to spiral out of our control.

She looked at me and beyond the haze in her hooded green green eyes, I realized what she wanted. Not just making love or bringing her fulfillment or any of the stuff that happens when you engage in sex.

_Just me_.

And I wanted her too, not just physically. But all of her to be mine.

I remember the rain as it fell that day. Huge drops splattering the earth. I could hear each drop fall much like the beating of my heart. I remember feeling cold then warm then on fire. I remember how her hair smelled like rain and of girl. I remember the taste of desire, sweet and spicy on my lips. I remember soft smooth skin, lush curves, silky hair and gentle caresses on my fingertips.

I remember green eyes filled with trust and love staring at me with understanding. Both of us knew that there was no going back from here. I remember her reaching up to kiss me as if to seal a silent deal– how this would change everything, and her arms enclosing me in a tight embrace as we breached into an unfamiliar territory of adulthood and left our remaining innocence behind.

It wasn't awkward this horizontal dance we were doing. It was as natural as breathing fire. I remember soft moans and tangled limbs and how right it felt to be one with her like this, as if we were melting into each other, our edges blurred and melded. And just before we reached that blinding bliss, I remember thinking I could never love anyone as much as I love her.

After, as I lay in her bed awake while Sakura slept with her head on my chest, our arms wrapped around each other, my hand lazily playing with her hair, I remember wishing I could hold her like this every night, spent and sated and _mine_. And as sleep claimed me, I remember hearing the wind outside humming a lullaby.

.

.

.

It would take another 2 years, a few fights (mostly my fault- possessiveness was another Uchiha trait) and cut hair (mostly hers) followed by clandestine make-up activities worthy of Icha Icha (what!? I could read and Kakashi was my sensei and he saw it fit to educate me in so many things), a truce between Uchiha and Senju (which Itachi has supported being the new clan head) before she became Uchiha Sakura. Finally, she had a last name, most importantly it was mine.

In a few weeks, Sakura would have another one of her dreams come true. She and I would be welcoming our little boy.

I plan to give her a big family, of black-haired boys and pink-haired girls, all with her eyes even if she wanted them to have mine and of course, my family's kekkei genkai. I dread of having pink-haired boys though but hopefully having the Sharingan will make them look threatening. She doesn't know of my plans yet but I'm sure I could persuade her. It was a goal I was very much looking forward to. This was one area I beat Itachi hands down. The continuation of my clan rests upon my shoulders or more crudely somewhere lower between my legs and no, it's not my kunai.

.

.

.

When I was younger, I never thought that my life would turn out like this. This was infinitely better than what I could have ever dreamed of. But Sakura believed otherwise, saying she knew it all along. Sometimes, I want to believe her too. And to think this all started when we first met.

* * *

**All I see is where our days repeat  
And our love goes on  
As our hair grows long**

\- Hellogoodbye


	6. These Words

**"These Words"**

Canon 693 and 699. Follow-up to Bulletproof. Sakura confesses her love again and this was Sasuke's reply.

.

.

.

**These words are my own**

**From my heart flow**

**I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you**

**There's no other way  
To better say  
I love you, I love you...**

* * *

.

.

.

_"The truth is... I've always known in my heart there was nothing I could have done for you. But I love you..!" _

_"No matter what's happened, I still care about you more than I can bear...If I could have taken away all your pain onto myself to comfort you, I would have...And here we are again, and still all I can do is sit here and cry. I'm so pathetic!"_

_"But...Sasuke-kun! If I still have a place somewhere in your heart, no matter how small it may be... then please... I'm begging you...Don't slip any further away! If we just stayed all together... forever... then I'm sure... someday... things would go back to the way they used to be..."_

It was embarrassing how she confessed her love again, this time Naruto and Kakashi-sensei were there to see it. She promised herself that the next time she'd do it, she'd make her words reach Sasuke-kun, that the next time she won't be annoying. That she'll never let him break her heart again.

Those were pretty good promises but then Sasuke-kun had always been her weakness. So here she was again, crying out love in the middle of nowhere, just before Naruto and Sasuke's face off.

_"You really are...damned annoying."_

Sasuke put her under a genjutsu after that. Having his hand through her chest and her heart being ripped out by him wasn't exactly the answer she was hoping for. She never hoped for a romantic confession. Kami! No! But Sasuke was downright hostile sometimes. A simple no would've sufficed. At least he said thank you back then when they were 12.

When she broke free of the genjutsu, she and Kakashi found them in the Valley of the End among the rubbles of Hashirama and Madara's statues which coincidentally formed the seal of reconciliation. She immediately went down to them and proceeded to heal their bleeding arm stumps.

_"Thanks! Sakura-chan!"_

_"Sakura... I..."_

_"Just shut up for now... I'm concentrating_."

Of all the times Sasuke wanted to talk to her, he was doing it now when she wanted to concentrate.

_"I'm sorry..."_

_"Sorry...? For what?"_

_"...for everything up till now_..."

And he was apologizing! Was she in a genjutsu again?

_"You'd better damn well be... Shaaanaroo... You jerk..."_

And just like that she forgave him. Because really how many times would she ever hear an apology from Sasuke-kun? Not like she could hold a grudge anyway.

_"Finally... They're back."_

Kakashi-sensei was right. Team seven was back again in business.

.

.

.

And when everyone woke up from the infinite tsukuyomi, and all the deaths and injured were accounted for, when the allied shinobi had to break up and head home to their villages, when Kakashi-sensei became the Rokudaime Hokage and the rebuilding of Konoha started again, when everything and everyone was slowly moving on to heal, Sasuke-kun had to leave again.

_"You're really gonna leave? Tsunade-sama is just about to finish creating your artificial arm out of Hashirama's cells..."_

_"Right now I need to see this ninja world for myself... I must know what kind of state the world is in... I feel like I'm finally able to see all that I've overlooked and missed up till now..." _

Do you really Sasuke-kun? Do you see me now?

_"And if I don't seize this opportunity I might my miss chance to see with this kind of clarity again. On top of that there's a few things that have been on my mind."_

Am I one of those Sasuke-kun?

_"Well what if... I asked you... to take me with you?" _

Please, please.

_"This is a journey of redemption for me. My sins have nothing to do with you."_

_"Nothing to do... with me?"_

This felt like that night again when he left her on that bench. Rejection and unrequited love sucks big time.

But then he poked her in the forehead using the index and middle finger of his only good arm.

_"I'll see you when I'm back... and thank you."_

She was frozen in place. Was this another genjutsu?

It was a finger poke to the forehead! Had she not known the story behind it she would have felt broken and inadequate again. But it was a finger poke to the forehead!

During the time Konoha was rebuilding and they were waiting for a decision regarding Sasuke, team seven had a lot of time and catching up to do. Sasuke had told them stories about his family and especially about Itachi.

It was Itachi's thing, the way he showed Sasuke his affection. The only form of affection Sasuke remembers and cherishes from his childhood.

And he did it to her. Kami! This was so much better than a kiss. But wait! Maybe she was getting ahead of herself.

He said he'll be back and she believed him.

It's fine that she has already said the words twice. Maybe next time she'll get a kiss or an 'I love you too' instead of a 'thank you'. She sincerely hopes for that time.

For now she'll content herself with a finger poke to the forehead.

She wouldn't get tired of crying out her love for him because her words have finally reached Sasuke-kun.

* * *

**That's all I got to say,**  
**Can't think of a better way,**  
**And that's all I've got to say,**  
**I love you, is that okay?**

\- Natasha Bedingfield

* * *

.

.

.

Dedicated to the many years I've been waiting for Sasusaku to happen. Patience is a virtue and perseverance pays off in the end. Just ask Sakura and Hinata. Thank you Masashi Kishimoto for making the long wait worth it.


	7. Somebody To You

**"Somebody to You"**

AU. Sasuke and Sakura as somebody and nobody.

* * *

_I'm nobody! Who are you?_  
_Are you nobody, too?_  
_Then there's a pair of us — don't tell!_  
_They'd banish us, you know._

_How dreary to be somebody!_  
_How public, like a frog_  
_To tell your name the livelong day_  
_To an admiring bog!_

_I'm Nobody! Who are you? by Emily Dickinson_

* * *

I'm nobody. Who are you?

I am a nobody in a school full of nobodies trying to be somebody or pretending to be somebody. Maybe that's just how high school is. Nobody likes to be nobody anymore and everybody likes to think of themselves as somebody where in fact they're just a bunch of nobodies. Not anybody could be somebody because somebody aren't made they are born.

I'm content being nobody. I don't stand out even with my pink hair and my straight As. It's difficult to stay in limbo between the upper echelon and lower crust of the totem pole. It takes a certain amount of skill not to have attention put on you. Anonymity is hard work. You have to avoid being singled out so you try to blend in the background, go along with the masses, never raise a hand even if you know the answer and never associate with the somebodies.

Why? You see more when you're a wallflower, hear more when you're a fly in the wall. Others don't notice you and find your presence unobtrusive so they let you be and they let down their guard. I have seen it all and heard it all from the mundane to the weird, to the scandalous and downright gross, from the sad and tragic to the happy and beautiful. For the last 3 years of high school that's how it's been for me.

And then there are somebodies who walk down this school. Some somebodies being bigger than other somebodies. They walk the school and demand attention, from their looks and poise and confidence in the way they carry themselves. They do things with a certain grace and careful calculation that you wish you had. They are nearest to perfect. Uchiha Sasuke was the biggest somebody I've seen for the last 3 years.

There was something about him that turns heads and parts the crowd when he walks or makes you listen when he talks. Maybe it's his dark eyes and hair complementing his fair complexion or how he talks with that silky voice. Maybe because he was smart without really trying or excels at any sport he tries. Maybe because he was friends with other somebodies. Maybe because he was an Uchiha so that in itself says something.

It was the last year of my high school when all this would change.

.

.

.

It was the summer before senior year when the news broke about the Uchiha coup. How somebody in their clan, Uchiha Fugaku was caught plotting against the current government. It was an instant fall from grace for the Uchihas. Their family was branded as traitors and their friends withdrew their support. I was dreading how all this would affect Sasuke once school starts if he ever shows up at school at all.

On the first day of school, Sasuke came dressed as usual but without his group of somebodies. I noticed too that no one else approached him to say hi and all were pointedly avoiding him or talking in hushed whispers about him. He was obviously the new school pariah and everybody feared of coming close to a social leper. Everybody but me anyway, although I don't know how to tell him that since we haven't talked to each other at all ever.

This went on for a month and I witnessed how Sasuke changed. He became distant and talked only when called upon by the teacher. He has stopped joining school activities and sports. He was always alone during lunch where I would catch him at the library where I usually am instead of at the rooftop with his friends. It made me think how the mighty have fallen and how everybody else was treating him like a nobody. But to me he was still somebody.

It was during one of our English projects about poets that I got my chance to talk to him. We were supposed to work in twos and I took it upon myself to tell our teacher that I would work with him because nobody would want to.

He was sitting at a corner in the library going through an Emily Dickinson book when I sat beside him.

"I'm nobody. Who are you?" I said.

He turned to me looking at me, surprise etched on his face before he drew a confused look. "You... you're Haruno Sakura." He stuttered.

"I know." But I didn't know he knew. "It's a poem. You're reading Emily Dickinson." I explained.

"Oh right. I'm Uchiha Sasuke." He introduced himself.

I would like to answer I know but it wouldn't be right because I only know about him. I don't know him.

"Of course you are. I'm your English partner. So I'm guessing we're doing Dickinson? Nice choice. I would've gone for E.E. Cummings but she also writes good stuff. I get the whole nobody thing." I cringed inwardly as I rambled.

"Uh, we could start now if you want and maybe we could work on it every after school." He said. Thank God I haven't scared him off.

"Sure. It's still due 2 weeks from now anyway. So we could do a little each day and not cram." I agreed.

We sat there everyday after school working through Dickinson's biography and poems and writing our paper. It was surreal spending time with him. I was a nobody in the presence of somebody.

When our paper was finished and we had passed it and gotten our A's, I thought that our afternoons would be over. I felt saddened but I thought that at least I was able to talk to him like I've always wanted to. It's a fact in highschool that somebodies don't have any business hanging out with nobodies. But I was proven wrong when he approached me during lunch at the library.

"What? I can't sit here anymore?" He asked.

"No, it's just you're somebody and I'm nobody." I answered out of surprise.

"Like anybody cares, I don't and you shouldn't too." He replied.

So we'd spend lunch together and later even after school, studying mostly and talking. And I could now say I know him. I know Uchiha Sasuke.

One weekend he invited me to his house and I met his mother and brother, who were both kind and gracious. I never saw his father and I didn't think it was my place to ask. I saw his room and how it looked typical.

"Huh, this is a little disappointing. It's so normal." I blurted, taking in the blue walls and the dark blue covers of his bed in the far wall and curtains,a set of cabinets and drawers by the opposite wall, bean bags at the foot of the bed, the usual study desk and laptop near the window, the shelf of books and trophies and clean pine scent.

"Well, what did you expect?" He asked.

"I don't know, something else I guess. Maybe a bit messier, filled with knickknacks and an entertainment system or game console perhaps, maybe the room would smell like a boy." I shrugged.

"Actually, I cleaned my room this morning. My mother made me. And all electronics are tucked behind the cabinet." He admitted.

"Oh, you didn't have to clean. I wouldn't mind. I'd rather see what you're room's really like, Sasuke-kun." I answered. Did I just say Sasuke-kun?

"Uh, I didn't mean to say that, not that I'm acting familiar and all." I apologized.

"It's okay, you already got to see my room. What's not familiar about that? And I promise I won't clean my room next time." He teased.

There was going to be a next time?

"So when do I get to see yours?"

I invited him in turn to our house the following week where I was severely embarrassed by my mother and father when they mistook him for my boyfriend and I had to repeatedly tell them that he was just a friend. Even calling him a friend seemed presumptuous of me.

Showing him my room, he just stood there taking it in. I tried to imagine what he could be thinking about my sea green walls and posters , my bed with the pink and green covers, the stars on my ceiling and the fairy lights, the lace curtains on the window, my shelf full of books and knickknacks, my cabinet covered in stickers and my desk with my laptop and the stack of papers and the corkboard tacked with pictures, postcards and quotes.

"Hn, It's you." He finally said.

"Yeah." I said, embarrassed. "And to think it only took me 18 years to make it look like this." I joked.

"It even smells like you."

"Uh, what do I smell like?" I asked in wonder, sniffing myself.

"It just smells like you." He shrugged his shoulders.

Seeing him out, I apologized about earlier and asked him if he was comfortable with me calling him my friend. "I'm sorry about my parents earlier. You see, I've never introduced anyone else to them as my friend except Ino and she's a girl and you're the first boy I introduced so they probably got a wrong idea."

"What's so wrong about that?" He said.

What's so wrong about that? I was trying to formulate an argument in my head about the many things wrong about that sentence when he talked again.

"Don't overthink it. You'll only hurt your brain. Is it so bad to be seen with me? Didn't you know I'm nobody too? There's a pair of us, don't tell." He said, quoting Dickinson.

"They'd banish us you know." I answered back.

"Don't worry. Getting banished was the best thing that ever happened to me."

"Don't say that."

"Say what?" He asked confused.

"Don't say it like you mean it."

"But I meant it."

"You were meant to be somebody, Sasuke-kun." I told him.

He stared at me for what felt like a minute, his eyes intense and expression thoughtful. For a second I thought he was going to kiss me. And I stopped myself from the thought. No don't go there, Sakura, that's just crazy and a whole lot of trouble.

"Sometimes, I don't know how you do it. You're just so busy being you that you don't notice how special you are."

"Don't say that."

"But I meant it, Sakura." He argued.

"Just don't say words like that easily, Sasuke-kun. You'd break a girl's heart someday." I warned him.

"Fine. But I still say we're a pair of nobodies." He insisted.

And so we were both nobodies in a school full of wannabe somebodies and I never felt happier to be a nobody.

.

.

.

When the news broke out that Uchiha Fugaku was innocent and was framed by another one of their relatives, Uchiha Madara. It was then I confirmed that Fugaku was his father. Suddenly everybody wanted to be his friend again.

Suddenly he was somebody to everybody again.

I feared that now that everybody wanted him back, he won't hang out with me anymore. His swarm of people has grown larger and it would just be too difficult to come near him or talk to him again. So I took the initiative to avoid him. He belonged with other somebodies.

I holed myself in the auditorium after class trying to avoid Sasuke and his groupies and was just on my way home when someone crept up behind me.

"Were you avoiding me? Because I went to the library and waited for you but you weren't there."

"Sasuke-kun!" I squealed in fright. "You almost gave me a heart attack!"

"I'm sorry. But were you avoiding me?" He asked again. "Because if you were, I understand. It's not easy being friends with someone whose father had been in jail."

"It's not that and you should know I never cared about that. But you're not nobody anymore so you can stop hanging out with me. Everybody thinks you're somebody again." I reasoned.

"But what if I don't want to be somebody? What if I want to be nobody?" He argued.

"You've always been somebody Sasuke-kun. You were just trying to be nobody. But it wouldn't work, as if you've ever stopped being somebody in the first place just because you wanted to." I told him.

"But we could still hang out together, right?"

"I don't think everybody's ready for that. It was okay when they were treating you like nobody but you're somebody again and they wouldn't take it lightly." I explained to him the workings of high school hierarchy.

"Don't sell yourself short, Sakura. You think you're nobody but you're not. You were never a nobody because I have always seen you. When you think no one's watching I see you." He said, his eyes fixed on me.

"You were always volunteering to help in the school drives putting up posters. You help pick up trash from the gym after the games and set up the recycle bins around the school. You always stay in the library and help organize the books. You erase the blackboards after the last class and you water Kakashi-sensei's plant. You help out your friend at the Yamanaka flower shop. You get straight A's tied only with mine. You never talked to me before but you were there when I was treated as an outcast. You talked to me and befriended me when no one else wanted to and never judged my family."

I was shocked by how much he knew about me. How much he's seen of me when I wasn't looking. And I quite don't know what to say.

"Don't you see, Sakura? You've always been somebody to me. I've always been meaning to talk to you but I was always afraid to try because you are the best person I've seen in this school. You did things on purpose and without asking for anything in return. And I can only be thankful of being nobody because you came up to me and talked to me. I don't care whatever stupid rule there is about nobodies and somebodies. I don't care about being somebody to everybody. All I ever wanted was to be somebody to you."

His confession shocked me. After the surprise has waned, I felt giddy and happy. Sasuke-kun thinks I'm somebody! But wait, did he just say he wanted to be somebody to me? I'm not reading too much into this right?

"Don't say that." I told him

"But I meant it." He answered back, stubbornly.

"Don't say words like that easily, Sasuke-kun. You could break a girl's heart." I warned him just like before.

"I'd never break yours." He promised.

He's actually serious! Oh my freaking! Pinch me. I must be dreaming.

"I've never wanted nobody but you. Sakura, I like you and I'm asking if you like me too." He said as he reached for my hand pulling me towards him.

For the first 3 years of high school, I never would have dreamed of something like this. But since this year started, things started to change.

I never thought myself liking Sasuke-kun, no matter how much I was fascinated by him before but I never really met him then. Spending time with him and getting to know him, I could say that I like him, really like him as more than just a school crush. I was content being a nobody and never aspired to be somebody but the idea of being somebody to him has given me a warm feeling in my chest.

"I like you too." I murmured as I stared into the deep pools of his eyes.

He smiled this beautiful brilliant smile that would've blinded anyone within a 100 feet radius. I was about to smile back when he leaned down capturing my lips in a sweet deep kiss that went on and on and on...

Until my lungs hurt and my head was woozy and my knees gave in but it was okay because Sasuke-kun caught me.

.

.

.

"So what are we now? Are we nobodies or somebodies?" He asked playfully, tugging on my hand as he was walking me home.

"I guess we could be whatever we wanted to be. But I'd much rather we be a pair of nobodies just as long as I'm somebody to you." I answered as I squeezed his hand in mine.

* * *

**_All I wanna be, yeah all I ever wanna be, yeah, yeah is somebody to you  
All I wanna be, yeah all I ever wanna be, yeah, yeah is somebody to you_**

**Everybody's tryna be a billionaire**  
**But every time I look at you I just don't care**  
**'Cause all I wanna be, yeah all I ever wanna be, yeah, yeah**  
**is somebody to you**

_Somebody to You – The Vamps_

* * *

I used to be nobody. Who are you?


	8. Build A Girl

**"Build A Girl"**

Modern AU. Naruto asks Sasuke to dream about his ideal girl.

.

.

.

**If I could build a girl**

**I'd build her just like you  
I'd stay up day and night  
To make her just like you  
It's just the way you are, the little things you do  
That makes me wanna build a girl like you  
Oh oh oh, build her just like you**

\- The Foo

* * *

.

.

.

"Hey, Teme! Aren't you a little bit envious that you're the only single guy left in our group? Actually you should be ashamed that you haven't even been in any relationship and you're almost 21!" Naruto badgered his bestfriend while they were waiting for their other friends for a guy's night at Sasuke's place.

"Dobe." The stoic Uchiha said in annoyance.

Naruto, his loud mouth of a bestfriend was spouting off nonsense again about Sasuke's lovelife or lack thereof.

It has been like this for the last 2 weeks. Just because the dobe unexpectedly grew balls and asked out Neji's cousin that he had been crushing on since high school he suddenly made it a mission to meddle with Sasuke.

"Don't act as if you're unaffected. I know you feel lonely when we all go out on date nights. Stuck-up Neji has Tenten. That lazy Shikamaru is torn between Ino and Temari. Chouji is courting a girl he met at the barbecue restaurant. Shino is dating someone from his Entomology club. Kiba the horndog may not be in a serious relationship but he has his flings. Sai may be crude but at least he already had sex. Even Lee is trying on line dating! And I'm pretty sure Hinata-chan will say yes when I ask her to be my girlfriend."

"Hn. I'll send her my sympathy and a leash." Sasuke answered back.

"Damn it! Sasu-teme! I'm trying to be serious here. Don't come to me when you're old and wrinkly crying because you're alone." Naruto said in a huff.

"I don't see the point of dating girls who only see me for my name and looks." Sasuke replied.

It has always been an Uchiha curse to be sought after by fangirls for their good looks and wealth. Even Sasuke's aniki and cousin had been victims before they eventually settled down with their chosen one. It wasn't like he hated girls he just haven't met one who held his attention or could speak to him on an intellectual level.

"Boohoo! Many would be thankful of what you call a curse. You're too pretty for a guy and you don't even care. Did you know there are rumors circulating around that you're gay and that you're secretly lovers with Professor Orochimaru? I swear you should stop taking extra classes from that slimy old dude!"

"W-what?!" Sasuke sputtered. It was preposterous. "Who would spread such nonsensical lies?"

"Maybe some of your rejected fangirls or any of the envious guys who would kill to be in your place. Frankly, Professor Orochimaru could be the one starting them. That creeper gives me the heebie jeebies. Eech! So I'm here me help you. Tell me what kind of girl you like and I'll do my magic."

"As if you're an expert on this dobe. You've only been dating Hinata for 2 weeks and I know that you're still a virgin too." Sasuke taunted.

"That may be the case but who do you think set up Neji and Tenten? Or introduced Shikamaru to Temari then Ino? And who do you think listens to Kiba's women troubles? I may not last a virgin for long and even so, I bet I jack off more than you do." Naruto bragged.

"What's this about jacking off I hear?" Kiba asked grinning like a dog, as he entered Sasuke's pad followed by the rest of the guys: Neji, Lee, Shikamaru, Chouji, Shino and Sai.

Naruto paled at the sight of Neji.

"Naruto, you better not be talking about my cousin." Neji said warily, his eyes shooting daggers at him.

"Oh it's nothing! Just kidding around with the teme! Ahehe!" Naruto answered back, hiding behind Sasuke.

"I believe him Neji. Naruto can't jack off because he is dickless." Sai interjected to which Kiba and Sasuke snickered.

"Fuck you!" Naruto snarled at Sai.

"Yeah, you wish." Sai replied with a fake smile.

"Troublesome." Shikamaru muttered at their antics as he sat down on the lazy boy.

"I concur. I believe this night is turning out to be fruitless if the two continue their petty squabble and if so I'd rather spend my night at home." Shino voiced out.

"Doing what? breeding bugs?" Kiba said, poking fun at Shino's hobby.

"Yeah, I'm missing out on my mother's pork ribs." Chouji seconded.

"Hey, can I come with you?" Kiba asked, knowing how good a cook Mrs. Akimichi was.

"Let's not rush my friends. The two are just spilling with youthfulness. And we must also do the same and not waste the night!" Lee said with his usual fervour.

"What were we supposed to do tonight anyway?" Neji asked in wonder, looking at the guys around him.

At this Naruto broke off from glaring at Sai and remembered what he was doing before the guys came.

"Settle down and I'll tell you. Chouji and Kiba, you guys get the pizza and chips from the kitchen, sodas and beers at the refrigerator." Naruto ordered them as he produced a whiteboard and a marker.

Chouji and Kiba hurried up to get the snacks as the rest of the guys scattered around the sofa and bean bags. When the refreshments had been passed out, Naruto started his spiel.

"As I was telling Sasuke-teme earlier, he is the only one in the group who remains single and unattached. And it isn't healthy and normal therefore he should get a girlfriend so he won't grow old, cold and lonely because she'll get the stick out of his ass."

"Finally!" The guys chorused.

"That's a great idea!" Lee agreed zealously. "Sasuke's cold and stoic facade will be melted by the warm heart of a beautiful girl!"

"Finally, he'll get some pussy." Kiba leered.

Neji was silent but he was smirking at Sasuke.

"And also so Professor Orochimaru could stop pining for his ass."

"Eew!" The guys groaned in revulsion, shivers running down their backs.

"What a drag! The mental picture is stuck in my head." Shikamaru whined.

"That's just gross and disturbing on so many levels." Shino complained.

"Damn it, Naruto! I think I just threw up in my mouth." Kiba cursed.

"I think I just lost my appetite." Chouji said as he stopped eating his pizza.

"Not that the picture of Uchiha with Orochimaru isn't a little bit funny but have you ever heard of cruel and unusual punishment? Are you trying to kill us?" Neji turned on Naruto.

"That's why I have decided to help teme find his ideal girl." Naruto continued over their cries of disgust.

"Why did you call all of us though?" Sai asked.

"Because as his friends, it's our duty to help him find a girl."

"This is troublesome but I'm in if only to get you off my back. Sorry Sasuke, I'd take your glares over Naruto's pestering." Shikamaru said.

"Hn." Sasuke grunted in understanding. He'd rather have Naruto do this now too so the dobe can get over it and stop pestering him.

"If Shikamaru's in then I'm in too." Chouji said in between munching his chips, getting his appetite back.

"Yeah, I'm all in for getting Sasuke laid." Kiba agreed, recovering from earlier.

The rest of the guys murmured their assent with Lee being the most enthusiastic.

"How do you propose we do this?" Neji asked.

"Simple we ask what teme wants in a girl or if he doesn't know help him decide what to look for in a girl based on our experiences and then compile the data and help him find such girl." Naruto explained.

"It's like drawing your ideal girl." Sai remarked.

"So teme if you could build a girl what do you want?" Naruto asked.

"Absolutely not a fangirl."

"Of course, what else?" Naruto prompted.

"She should be smart." Neji supplied.

"Definitely." Sasuke seconded.

"Like Shikamaru smart?" Chouji asked.

"Not necessarily. Smart enough that we could talk about various things without me wanting to bang my head against a wall but if she were smarter that would be better. She should be smart enough to impress my family." Sasuke said.

"So a girl with brains." Naruto wrote on the board.

"She should have a kind and compassionate heart." Shino spoke up which surprised everyone.

"What? Like a nun?" Sai joked.

"Not like that, maybe like a teacher or doctor. She should be patient and helpful and someone who makes friends easily. This should go for people and animals. But she has to be sincere. It's easy for her to act all nice and good around you but be a complete bitch to others behind your back." Shino expounded.

"Yes, definitely. She needs to be kind and patient in order to deal with teme." Naruto said as he wrote kind-hearted to the list.

"Hn. She'd need it around you more dobe."

"Furthermore she should be self-confident." Shikamaru added. "There's nothing like self-confidence that makes a woman sexy. Knowing herself and what she wants in life without being arrogant and having the determination to pursue it is attractive. She also needs to be confident so she won't easily get jealous and trust that you won't cheat on her."

"That sure sounds like from experience." Naruto teased Shikamaru as he added it to the list.

"I have to agree, knowing Sasuke's family and his many fangirls, his would-be girlfriend needs it so she won't crack under the pressure." Neji said.

"Aa."

"She should know how to cook well." Chouji said. "My mother shows my father and us how much she loves us by her excellent cooking. A girl who knows her way in the kitchen is family-oriented and thinks of everyone's health and well being. She'll make a good home-maker and mother. Plus it saves you from having to cook for yourself."

"Hn, that sounds good." Sasuke own mother was a good cook and makes sure he eats on time and cooks his favorite meals when he's at home.

"Must know how to cook." Naruto added to the list.

"She should be youthful! She should know a sport or martial arts or at least exercises regularly." Lee said eagerly. "After all, Sasuke plays many sports and is a black belt in karate therefore they should live healthy and fit lives. Also it's better if she knows how to defend herself if Sasuke is not around."

"That's actually not a bad idea." Sasuke considered.

"Of course, it would mean she has a killer body." Kiba added with a leer as Naruto wrote Lee's input.

"What else about her physically would you like Sasuke?" Naruto asked.

"Yes, you Uchihas are what women would say physically attractive but would you also want someone like your counterpart? I would expect you don't want someone ugly to taint your gene pool but can you be specific about what you like in your ideal girl?" Sai asked holding a sketchpad and his coloured pencils.

At this Sasuke closed his eyes in contemplation. "She doesn't have to have a specific look but I think it would be better if she does not look like one of us otherwise I would have dated a distant cousin. Someone with fair skin but with a healthy glow, small maybe heart-shaped face, pink slightly plump lips and an attractive nose..."

"Would you like a wide forehead?" Naruto asked as he instructed Sai what to draw.

"It doesn't matter as long as it fits her face." Sasuke answered.

"How about her eyes and hair?" Naruto asked.

"Long or short hair doesn't matter as long as it suits her and maybe large expressive eyes."

"Make it shoulder length pink hair and green eyes." Naruto told Sai.

"W-what? I did not say pink hair and green eyes." Sasuke argued opening his eyes.

"But you said you don't want her to look like a typical Uchiha. Besides this is an artist's prerogative." Sai countered as he continued his drawing based on Naruto's prompts.

"You should let Sai continue his drawing, who knows he might surprise you. Besides your ideal girl can't be that perfect." Naruto said.

"Why can't she?" Sasuke argued.

"Because it's impossible."

"Speaking of which, what least attractive trait or maybe least likable quirk or attitude would you tolerate in your ideal girl?" Kiba asked. "Because let me tell you, I've dated many girls and they are all different but sometimes they tend to have the same annoying habits."

"Yeah, troublesome." Shikamaru agreed.

"I don't know. I pretty much hate every girly habit there is." Sasuke replied. "But I guess I could tolerate her being chatty as long as it's relevant that way she could speak for the both of us. Besides, I lasted being friends with the dobe despite his motor mouth."

"Whatever, teme. I lasted being your friend too despite interpreting your grunts and dealing with your mood swings." Naruto answered back.

"It's finished. I'd say it's my best work so far." Sai said as he showed them his handiwork.

"She's like the goddess of spring!" Lee gushed.

"Woah! Hot damn!" Kiba cursed enthusiastically.

"Beautiful." Neji said.

"Just like a cherry blossom." Chouji said in awe.

"Huh, she sure is." Shikamaru concurred.

"I take it back. If I didn't have Hinata, I'd say she's perfect." Naruto remarked.

Sasuke was at a loss for words. The guys have said it all. She looked nothing like the girls he has seen. The pink hair green eyes combo sounded weird in theory but the dobe was right, it looked perfect on her. He was so mesmerized looking at her that he hardly caught what the dobe was saying.

"So what do you think of her, teme?"

"She looks uh... nice." Damn it! Why was he getting flustered?

"Just nice huh? It's alright, I guess, after all she's not real anyway." Naruto said nonchalantly.

_Not real_.

At Naruto's words, Sasuke felt something sink in his stomach. He was disappointed. How could he forget that they were just talking about his ideal girl? How could he forget that the girl that Sai has drawn did not exist in real life? Now he'll be stuck dreaming and fantasizing about her.

"What matters really teme, is that she accepts you and loves you for who you are, for all your positive attributes and all your faults. And that you would do the same for her."

Naruto then instructed them to find a real girl like what Sasuke wants in his ideal girl list and introduce her to Sasuke. The guys then started a few rounds of poker while drinking and sharing funny stories courtesy of Naruto and Kiba. They left just past midnight after helping him clean up.

Naruto was the last to leave but not before leaving him his parting words. "Keep on dreaming teme. Who knows your dream girl might come true?"

"Hn, later dobe." Sasuke said as he locked his door.

He took a shower and changed into his pajama pants. He laid down on his bed facing his right and was surprised. The dobe must have pinned her portrait to his wall when he wasn't looking. Whatever, she could stay there and maybe he'd dream of her.

.

.

.

It had been 3 months of dreaming of her almost nightly and sometimes fantasizing about her as he jacked off before Sasuke swore he would forget about her and removed her portrait from his wall. It wasn't healthy to be too attached to a girl that doesn't exist.

He was at a Hyuuga party. Neji and Tenten's graduation and engagement party to be exact. He was happy for them both and somewhere deep in his heart he was envious of what they had. Naruto too had gotten his dream fulfilled 2 months ago when Hinata agreed to be his girlfriend. The dobe had been insufferably happy since then.

He was standing on the sides behind a column sipping on his punch; hiding from the other female guests in attendance, wondering where his friends were and watching couples dance with their dates when he thought he was hallucinating. Did the dobe spike the punch?

Because how could he explain how his dream girl was walking towards him while he was still awake? It was her. The familiar pink hair and green eyes wouldn't lie.

"Oh! I'm sorry for intruding but I didn't think anyone would be here. Because why would anyone purposefully stand behind columns at parties? It's just that I'm not really into parties like this but I'm attending because an old friend who I haven't seen in years encouraged me to come. And there's this odd fellow who kept saying things about youth and spring following me around wanting to introduce me to his friend. And I was trying to lose him and I saw this column and thought it was a good hiding place. So you must be hiding too? By the way, hi! I'm Haruno Sakura." She said in one breath.

_Sakura_. He finally found his cherry blossom.

"Uchiha Sasuke." He managed to answer eventually.

"I thought you were also going to act weird around me. I've passed by a group of boys who looked stunned to see me. Must be my hair. I always get surprising reactions about my pink hair."

She had no idea.

"Are you friends with anyone here? Or maybe went to school with them?"

"I'm friends with Neji and we go rather he went to the same University as me."

"Oh! It's my first time to meet them. I think they make a great pair. Although Neji seemed weird when he first met me. Tenten told me how they met in college through a mutual friend. Is that how you knew them?"

"Neji was my senpai in highschool and I met Tenten through him."

"It must be nice to still have friends you met when you were younger. I only have one left. Mostly because my parents' works cause us to move around a lot so I don't get to keep friends and we lose contact through the years but I'm happy that this one friend of mine never gave up on me."

"Sometimes. But sometimes you want to kill them for being annoying." He answered, thinking of Naruto.

"It's funny how the friend of mine is like that too. It's because of him that I decided to attend here while I'm checking out the University here in Konoha. I'm starting to think that entering medical school here was a wise decision."

"You're going to be a doctor?" He asked in astonishment.

"Yeah, it's all I could talk about when I was a child. I played doctor with my dolls and stuffed toys then later on with my pets. I want to help people and save them if I could. I'm excited to start my first year in medical school next term."

"But you can't be older than me. I'll be a senior next term." He said, surpised.

"Oh. I managed to compress my premed courses into 3 years. It was grueling but it was worth it. Now I would be the youngest in my class and I would finish med school a year earlier than normal. I heard that the Dean of Medicine, Dr. Senju Tsunade is the best there is and only accepts the best so I intend to apply as her intern once I graduate."

So she was smart and confident. "Do you know how to cook?"

"Huh? Well, I had to learn because my parents were mostly away and I had to fend for myself and sometimes fix them breakfast or dinner. And not to brag or anything but they say I'm a decent cook." She answered.

Check. "Do you exercise or play sports?"

"I run when I could. I used to play softball and soccer in highschool and I have a black belt in karate. My parents deemed it important that I learn to protect myself because I was often bullied when I was younger because of my wide forehead and pink hair."

Another check. Damn! No wonder her legs looked great and her body proportions were perfect. "Do you have any annoying traits?"

"Oh! I guess I have a little OCD when it comes to cleaning and arranging my stuff. And I'm quite talkative at times."

"Hn." He could live with those.

"Are we playing 20 questions? So my question earlier, are you hiding too?"

"Aa."

"I think I could guess why. I hate being judged for my looks as well. I'd rather meet a guy who is sincere with his intentions, smart and confident. His looks would only be a bonus."

He knew it! She wasn't a fangirl. "Hn."

"You don't talk much do you?"

"Aa."

"I could live with that. My friend tells me he has a bestfriend like you. It would be funny if you knew each other."

No it wouldn't. "Do you have something to do tomorrow?"

"Umm... no. Why?" She asked, confused.

"Good. Because I'll be picking you up for a date tomorrow after I bring you home tonight." He told her.

"You're serious about this." She stated.

"I always am." Sasuke replied.

"What if I say no?" She inquired.

"You wouldn't." He stated confidently.

"Why not?"

"Because you're smart and I'm pretty sure my looks are a bonus." Sasuke smirked.

"Why me?"

"Because I think I have just dreamt you into life."

Now who would say he doesn't know how to use pick -up lines?

.

.

.

"Teme! Where have you been hiding these past few months? I understood when you went missing all summer break but since school started you keep bailing on me when I ask you to hang out and we haven't had a guy's night since the night before Neji's engagement party." Naruto cornered him as he came out of his last class.

"I'm busy dobe." Sasuke answered as he tried to lose him.

"Hey! I'm not finished with you yet. Something tells me you're hiding something and you can't hide from me for long. What is that on your neck? Is that a hickey?" Naruto exclaimed scandalized.

"Whatever. I gotta go." He said hurriedly as he escaped from Naruto and ran all the way to the Medicine building.

"Teme! I'm not yet finished with you!" Naruto shouted after him.

* * *

"Were you waiting long?"

"No, I just got out of class."

He stood before her and pulled her to him.

"Hi Sasuke-kun." Sakura greeted him before she moved to give him a chaste peck on the lips.

Sasuke however had other plans and deepened the kiss, loving the feel of her lips on his. It's been 3 months since they've been officially together plus 2 months when they started dating. But Sasuke wasn't really counting.

"Sasuke-kun people are watching." She chided him as she pulled away breathless and buried her face on his chest from embarrassment

"So? They're just jealous that you're mine." He said.

"I think it's the opposite. They're jealous that you're mine." She argued.

"It's not our fault then. Let them die of jealousy."

"It would be counterproductive to my chosen field to let them die." Sakura joked.

"Then let's get out of here and do this somewhere private." Sasuke said and pulled her in a hurry.

* * *

"Teme! Open up!" Naruto banged on his door early Saturday morning.

A groggy Uchiha opened up the door glaring at Naruto.

"Finally! My sources say that you brought a girl to your house and introduced her to your family. Could it be that you have finally found yourself a girlfriend?" Naruto said as he hastily entered Sasuke's place lest the door gets slammed on his face.

Then upon noticing Sasuke's condition, with mussed up hair and wearing only his boxers he couldn't hide his surprise. "Kami-sama! Those two really weren't lying! There is a girl! And you're having sex! Aaah!" Naruto shouted in disbelief.

"Quiet dobe! If by sources you mean, Itachi and Shisui then yeah and so what?" Sasuke wearily said, his patience thinning.

"How could you!? After all the planning I did for you to find your dream girl. Where is she?" Naruto cried, heading for Sasuke's bedroom.

"Sasuke-kun?" A sleepy voice hidden beneath Sasuke's covers emerged.

A girl with shoulder-length pink tresses sleepily rubbing her green eyes clad in Sasuke's shirt was suddenly awake upon seeing the blond followed by Sasuke.

"Naruto!?"

"Sakura-chan?!"

"You know each other?" Sasuke asked confused.

"Remember when I told you how funny it would be if you knew my friend?" Sakura answered grinning.

"Teme! You've deflowered the cherry blossom! You popped her cherry!" Naruto fake cried.

"Shut up Naru-baka! It was mutual anyway." Sakura said as Sasuke grew red from either embarrassment or anger.

"Wait until the guys hear this. Is this why you've been keeping away from us?" Naruto asked, grinning deviously.

"I just wanted to be able to date her without interruptions and without any of you meddling. But mostly I just wanted my privacy with her." Sasuke defended himself.

"Yeah, yeah. You have a lot to make up to us. The guys have all seen Sakura-chan at Neji's party and they were all eager to find her for you but it seemed that you already found her."

"I didn't. She found me." Sasuke answered, smiling at the memory.

Naruto looked to Sakura for clarification.

"He was hiding behind a column from his fangirls. I was hiding from a guy talking about youth and spring who may or may not be your friend." Sakura explained.

"That sounded accurately like Lee." Naruto said.

"Well, you've overstayed your welcome dobe." Sasuke said as he ushered Naruto towards the door to exit.

"Don't think I'm not onto you, Sasuke-teme! You just want to continue defiling Sakura-chan."

"And so? You should be ashamed you're not doing the same thing."

"I forgot! Hinata-chan will meet me for breakfast. Gotta go, teme." Naruto suddenly said as he went out the door in haste.

"Hn." The dobe was really a scatterbrain.

"Hey Sasuke!" Naruto called out from the hallway before he could close the door. "I was right when I told you to keep dreaming."

* * *

Later that night as Sasuke laid in bed with Sakura asleep in his arms, he was jolted by a realization.

_The dobe knew._


	9. Wanted

**"****Wanted"**

AU Rated M-ish. They met. They became best friends. They grew up together. They became more.

* * *

**When I wrap you up  
When I kiss your lips  
I wanna make you feel wanted  
And I wanna call you mine  
Wanna hold your hand forever  
And never let you forget it  
'Cause, baby, I, I wanna make you feel wanted**

**You'll always be wanted**

\- Hunter Hayes, cover by Alex Goot and Julia Sheer

* * *

.

.

.

**They met.  
**

They met as children among Konoha's grassy hills when he was running after his wayward kite while she was picking flowers to press dry. He didn't see her partially hidden by the tall grass and tripped on her outstretched legs. They both apologized and said their awkward introductions. Sakura kept her hair over her face, conscious of her forehead. Sasuke wouldn't smile having just lost his two front teeth.

Sasuke belonged to a large clan, the Uchihas. They were a traditional family that came from old money dating back centuries. Sakura came from an upper middle class family, the Harunos. They were considered new rich. Both her parents were professionals and worked hard for everything they had.

**They became bestfriends.**

They had nothing in common except the desire to prove themselves. Sasuke, to his clan, who saw him as nothing more than a spare heir. His older brother, Itachi, was his father'sfavourite. Sakura, to her parents, who felt cheated out of having a son. Her parents suffered many pregnancy losses before her and could not have any more children after her.

Both felt unwanted.

Still they became good friends, best friends. They went to different schools but spent the weekends and the summers of their youth among the grassy hills and hidden meadows chasing dragonflies, flying his kite, making daisy chains and lying on their backs watching clouds. They would cool off by diving off at the docks by the lake and floating on their backs. They would carelessly run in the rain splashing mud and cheering for more rain to fall.

**They grew up together.  
**

Life was easier then. They could sleep beside each other without being scolded. There was no boy or girl discrimination. They were just Sasuke and Sakura. But puberty and growing up has a way of ruining things.

Who knew better about Sasuke's morning wood than Sakura who would feel it pressed against the back of her thigh when she would wake up before him. And who would know better than Sasuke what Sakura's adolescent breast felt like when he would wake up earlier than her to find his hand cupping it while they slept.

They were 12 when Sakura started wearing a training bra and they were banned from sleeping beside each other even though they had been doing it since they were 7 years old. They didn't understand why.

They were 13 when they saw his 20 year-old cousin Shisui doing something they couldn't get their eyes off. It was right after they had their picnic in one of the hidden meadows when they heard a moan. Curious as to the sound of someone who might be injured they decided to search for it. They were surprised to find Shisui pinning a girl against a tree with her legs wrapped around his waist. He looked like he was eating the girl's face and the girl seemed to like it by the way she was also trying to eat his cousin's face off. They separated after some time probably to breathe with a trail of saliva separating them. They saw Shisui lick and suck the girls neck as the girl moaned. They went off running when they saw Shisui start to undo the girl's blouse. They promised each other to forget about it.

It wasn't long after that when Shisui approached Sasuke to teach him the ways to please a woman and himself. Shisui was delighted to find out that unlike Itachi, Sasuke seemed to have a pair of functioning balls secreting hormones. He could only think of one girl Sasuke would use his new knowledge on. He'd been expecting them to ever since Sasuke brought her home when he was 7.

**They became more.**

They were 14 when they started to experiment on kissing out of curiosity and out of want. They started from chaste ones with lips closed and light pecks to kisses with mouths open where they continue until they have to come up for air. It was during one of their open mouthed kisses when Sasuke touched Sakura's tongue with his that they discovered just why eating someone's face off was addicting. It was also then that they realized why they were restricted from sleeping beside each other because you cannot trust teenagers with raging hormones.

They were 15 when they started to tentatively touch each other as they kissed. There was just something delicious about the way Sasuke would grip her waist and hips or how her ample breasts fit his palm. He would shiver when Sakura would scrape her nails down his back or let her hand wander up and down his abs and chest. He loved to entangle his hand in her silky long hair and feel the pulse in her neck beating against his palm much like the way his own heart would race inside his chest.

It wasn't long after everything above the waist was fair game. Who knew that the spot between Sasuke's neck and shoulders were sensitive when sucked on or that he would moan when she nibbled on his earlobes? Who knew that Sakura's left nipple was more sensitive or that it gave her the first taste of orgasm? Sasuke spent many days wearing high neck collars while Sakura wore turtle necks even during the hottest of days.

They were 16 when Sasuke experienced his first orgasm with Sakura's handjob. Her hand was so much better than his. It was also the first time Sakura allowed his hand under her knickers. Everything was just so soft and wet and warm as he tentatively probed her with his fingers. The orgasm she experienced was much better than her first.

She bled the next day and they got worried. Shisui helped them and brought them to a doctor. Her menstruation finally came after years and years of waiting. They got a lecture on the menstrual cycle, contraception and sexually transmitted diseases. It was enough to scare them for a while but they decided to be smart about it. They read and studied about human body and safe sex and discovered erogenous zones and sexual positions. He pilfered books from Shisui and stared at the illustrations seriously as if he were studying an abstract portrait. They weren't ready yet for the next step but they wanted to be prepared for it.

They were 17 when Sakura and Sasuke would never look at each other's tongues the same way again. Sasuke would adjust his pants everytime Sakura would lick an ice cream and Sakura would clench her thighs when Sasuke would suck on a straw. Sasuke would claim he saw stars and Sakura would claim she understood why they called it 'the little death'.

They entered the same university during college. Sasuke would take up law while Sakura would take up medicine. People were sceptical of them but they plan to prove them wrong. It's enough for them that they believed in each other's dreams.

Through the years other girls and boys would try to come in between them. After all the once shy Sakura who covered her forehead with her hair has grown to be a striking beauty with her pink locks, green eyes and flawless skin. And Sasuke, like all Uchihas with their dark hair and eyes and fair complexion would have an irresistible smirk. But none who tried succeeded. How could they when Sasuke and Sakura had eyes only for each other?

They are now 18 and ready. They don't think of it as losing their virginity, although technically they have not been innocent for some time. They consider it as a show of unwavering trust, a gifting of intimacy. Though Sakura would say later on that it sure as hell hurt the first time like her lower half was being split but thanked Sasuke for being careful and patient.

There's this moment where Sasuke is above her when Sakura sees his eyes go wide at the novelty of the experience at the exact moment she feels him push into her just before he closes them from the overwhelming sensation. When he opens his eyes to look at her as he starts to move, Sakura could see the tenderness in them as if she has just given him the stars. It is enough to distract her from the pain of being invaded. On a literal and figurative level, she thinks that by doing this, Sasuke is filling up this emptiness inside of her. And as he moves in and out of her, she swears more of her is lost in him as more of Sasuke is lost in her.

Sasuke's mind is blown by how being wrapped up in Sakura feels so fucking amazing. And he wonders if it was the act itself or because he was doing it with her. And as Sakura tugs at the hair on his nape and drapes her legs around his waist and he feels himself sink deeper into her, he decides that everything has to do with her. So he kisses her, sealing her lips with his, catching her moans and sighs, exchanging breaths and their essences.

Then there is this feeling building up from Sakura's loins to her chest as if she is climbing and falling at the same time and there's a pounding in her ears and a rush to her head before everything suddenly stops. For a few seconds, she's blind and deaf and weightless before sensation rushes back and she feels her release. Her body arches and her toes curl and Sasuke's name escape from her lips as she clings to him.

Sasuke feels her walls squeezing him and continues to thrust faster and harder trying to follow her until his own body jerks and shivers. He moans Sakura's name like it was a lifeline and comes inside her. Sakura feels a spurt of warm wetness inside her and oh fuck! She feels her second orgasm and succumbs to bliss.

Sakura holds him close as he collapses against her, his head pillowed between her breasts. She brushes his hair off his sweaty forehead and he looks up to her. They share a lazy tender kiss. She wants to say thank you for the experience and for sharing their first time together. She wants to say I love you even if they were still too young to understand what it really means. But this surely feels a lot like love. She smiles instead as they kiss. She feels tired and sleepy but she doesn't want Sasuke to pull out even as she feels him soften. She wants to stay pressed beneath him, his weight anchoring her to reality.

Sasuke wants to thank her for sharing a part of her with him. He wants to say that he will take care of her heart because he knows that is what she has just given him. He wants to say I love you because the thought has been filling his head and heart since they had been 13. But he smiles back instead into the kiss. He feels boneless and sated and doesn't want to move off Sakura. He wants to stay like this for a while connected to her.

It would be the first time they will be sleeping together in the same bed since they were 12. Maybe next time they will exchange positions while they sleep. They may not exchange 'I love yous' yet, in fact they weren't even officially a couple but it was only a matter of time. Everyone thinks they would end up with each other anyway. And if one would argue, Sasuke and Sakura had practically been together since they were like 7 and as more since they were 14. 13 if you would count when Sasuke started to have wet dreams about her.

Both are fiercely possessive of each other and both only ever wanted each other. It had never been about just lust between them. It's all about wanting to be closer, wanting to make the other completely theirs, wanting to make the other feel wanted. It goes without saying that they had always belonged to each other.

Sakura lets Sasuke listen to the beat of her heart and lets it lull him to sleep so that he may dream of her. He looks relaxed, peaceful, content with the corners of his mouth upturned just a little bit. She yawns, exhaustion claiming her, and closes her eyes dreaming of tomorrow. When they wake up, she knows they'll do it again because they were both perfectionists and practice makes perfect or that they were just hormone-driven teenagers with lots of time and there was so much more positions to try now that they can use their research. Sasuke wanted to try it in the shower standing up against a wall and she definitely wanted to try being on top.

She sleeps with a content smile on her face thinking that for their first time this is pretty much perfect.


	10. Every Other Time

**"****Every Other Time"**

Modern AU OOC. Because Sasuke and Sakura love each other truly madly deeply... except when they were ready to kill each other.

.

.

.

**I said let's talk about it as she walked out on me and slammed the door  
But I just laugh about it 'cause she's always playin' those games  
C'mon deep down I know she loves me  
But she's got a funny way of showin' me how she cares  
Last night she did a donut on my lawn and drove out with her finger in the air**

**Sometimes we sit around just the two of us on the park bench**

**Sometimes we swim around like two dolphins in the oceans of our hearts  
but then I think about the time that we broke up before the prom  
and you told everyone that I was gay "ok"  
Sometimes I walk around the town for hours just to settle down**

**But I take you back and you kick me down **

**'****cause that's the way uh-huh uh-huh I like it  
**_  
_**Sometimes it's black, sometimes it's white  
Sometimes she's wrong, sometimes I'm right  
Sometimes we talk about it or we figure it out **

**But then she just changed her mind  
Sometimes she's hot, sometimes I'm cold  
Sometimes my head wants to explode**

**But when I think about it I'm so in love with her  
Every other time**

\- LFO

* * *

.

.

.

"This is not working out, Sasuke-kun. Let's break up." Sakura said out of the blue while I met up with her after her class.

I wasn't surprised. According to my calculations, we were due for a break-up anyway.

.

.

.

_Sakura was and is my first and only girlfriend and ex-girlfriend. _

_The first time she told me we were breaking up we were five. _

_She was older than me by almost 4 months and so she thought it okay to boss me around. (A fact she still does today.)Back then I was naive and docile and wanted to please everyone. (Still am actually.) _

_You would too if the cutest girl in class approached you during snack time calling you Sasuke-kun and asked you to be her boyfriend because according to her your hair was the shiniest in class and you had the prettiest eyes. _

_I was flustered and pleased with her attention so I tell her that her pink hair and green eyes were out of the ordinary and offered her the chocolate chip cookie my mother baked. She took it with a smile and kissed me on the cheek. I flushed further and must have looked like a tomato because she giggled. _

_I was cheering inside. I was a boyfriend! It means I am a grown-up because only older boys have girlfriends. I can't wait to tell Itachi-nii!_

_During naptime she asked me to sleep beside her. I was too happy to feel embarrassed. Naruto who usually sleeps beside me snores a lot so I couldn't really sleep much. I let her borrow dino-chan to sleep with out of gratitude. _

_We sat together during art time and she let me borrow her favourite red crayon which I promptly broke as I was colouring my drawing. For someone who looked innocent and harmless, she was positively scary. (Another reason I let her boss me and never really complained because an angry Sakura is oni-Sakura. I still have the faint scar of teethmarks on my arm to prove it.)_

_We were in a relationship for approximately 2 hours and 15 minutes. _

_After classes, I told her I was sorry even if I was the one who got sent to the infirmary and had his arm bandaged. I gave her the heart I drew and coloured as an apology. I originally meant to give it to her as a gift for being my girlfriend because that was what boyfriends did or so Shisui-nii says._

_She told me we could still be friends if I give her my chocolate chip cookies every recess. I agreed thoughtlessly. I didn't really like sweets anyway. (Still don't actually.) Sometimes I wonder if it was the cookie she was really after._

.

.

.

I would've given it more thought if it weren't the 23rd or maybe it was the 24th time we broke up (according to her anyway.) Maybe I'll ask Naruto later. Amazingly Naruto remembers all the times we broke up. He has been around most of them and fancies himself the authority on all things sasusaku. (Yep, we have our own moniker.)

Then I remember it was definitely the 24th because around 3 months ago she broke up with me when I had my hair cut really short. She hated it because she couldn't run her fingers through my hair. A habit she has when I'm driving and she's sitting next to me or when she's kissing the hell out of me. I love it the most when she plays with my hair when I'm tired because it relaxes me and I sleep better not that she knows. As a consequence, she wouldn't let me play with her hair when we make-out and started wearing her hair in a bun. She knew how much I loved her cotton candy hair.

.

.

.

_This wasn't the first trivial thing we broke up about and not the first time she punished me._

_We've broken up when I laughed at her when she thought Itachi-nii's friend Deidara was a girl. She laughed at me when I thought her sparring partner Haku was a girl and helped him beat me up._

_We have broken up over my being minutes late to a movie we've already watched because she says the second time was better. Not if the lead still dies it wasn't. She made me watch chick-flicks for almost 24 hours._

_We've broken up because I like tomatoes in every meal then made me eat natto. Ewww._

_We've broken up because she claimed I spend too much even if I spend it all on her. It's not like my family's going to be poor anyway but still she made me spend on a budget._

_We've broken up when I missed a karate tournament of hers because I got food poisoning from eating at Naruto's place. The idiot gave me expired milk. She told me I deserved it because I was stupid enough to eat something from Naruto._

_We've broken up because I wear the same boring colours – black, gray, dark blue and white. The next time we shopped she made me buy this floral printed polos and cartoon-themed shirts. _

_We've broken up because she claimed I spend too much time with Naruto (like I chose to when it was Naruto who kept bugging me) and proceeded to tell everyone that I was probably gay._

_During the first months of our relationship I wanted to fight with her about everything. Sometimes I want to throttle her when she's mouthing off or telling me about her next punishment or just stand my ground and be a man or to just let her go. But I always give in and we always got back together. _

_._

_._

_._

"What is it about this time?" I asked her calmly.

"Your hair." She answered with a pout, the cutest pout on the most kissable lips.

"What about my hair? I thought you wanted it longer again." I was confused. Really? What's the problem this time?

"Sure I wanted it longer but the other girls wanted it too. They keep talking that you look like some prince or hero in a manga. I saw that red-headed girl in the hallway shoot googly eyes at you. Why do you have to be so good-looking?" She glared at me.

.

.

.

_And sometimes she says something or does things so unexpectedly sweet that I just want to kiss her senseless._

_After helping Haku beat me up, she treated my bruises and beat Haku up in their next spar._

_After making me watch chick flicks for almost 24 hours she let me and the guys have a Call of Duty marathon._

_After feeding me natto, she cooked me pasta with her special tomato sauce, whose recipe remains a secret._

_She helped me manage my allowance so I was able to save up and buy my own car without asking from my parents._

_She took care of me when I was sick. Bringing me the waste bucket and rubbing my back when I was vomiting, making me drink lots of fluids to help keep me hydrated and kicking Naruto in the ass for poisoning me._

_When I agreed to buy the clothes she picked she made me help her choose her lingerie at Victoria's Secret.  
_

_When the news spread that I was gay, many of the girls who used to follow me around disappeared and the guys steered clear of me even Naruto, which didn't bother me because then I had more time to spend with her doing stuff like watching her model her lingerie, making out and then some._

.

.

.

Talk about the pot calling the kettle black. I would have laughed if I knew she wouldn't hit me. My girlfriend was jealous!

Sakura who was beautiful even without make-up, who was a tomboy that loved sports and a nerd for books and studying, who was a bit tsundere, who was amazing and exasperating at the same time, who usually doesn't give a damn what people say was jealous!

Aaah! I should commemorate this day when Sakura feels the insecurity I sometimes feel when I think I got lucky with her. I wasn't the best at anything but I always did my best. She has better grades than me. (Duh! She was only running for valedictorian.) She has a blackbelt at karate and was the president of the archery club. (Great! She could kick my ass at close combat and shoot my ass with an arrow from a distance.) She was easily one of the most popular girls at school among the boys and she could have any guy she wants yet she chose me and I didn't know why.

.

.

.

_The second time she asked me to be her boyfriend we were 15. _

_"__I've decided 10 years is enough time. Don't you think, Sasuke-kun?" She told me as she approached me during lunchbreak. _

_"__Enough time for what?" I asked confused as I handed her a chocolate chip cookie._

_Sakura and I have kept on friendly terms throughout the years. I was still her cookie supplier after all and we more or less hang with the same friends- Naruto, Ino, Hinata, Shikamaru, Chouji, Kiba, Shino, Sai, Neji, Tenten and Lee. We've gone on outings and movies with our group. We've visited each other's houses and talked about our families, hopes and goals in life. She helped me study for exams and always chose me as a partner for projects and for labwork. _

_And throughout the years, I have only developed more than friendly feelings for her. It was a crush that wouldn't go away. Not when she's even more beautiful than cute now than when we were five or that underneath all her complexities she was a real softie. Not when my family loves her and is bugging me why I haven't made my move yet (my mother especially) and not when I have felt the stirrings of male hormones at work since we were 13 whenever I was around her._

_"__Enough time for a break, silly. We're relatively more mature now. (Mature my butt. Refer to her trivial reasons for breaking up.) I wouldn't bite you for breaking my pen. And I still think you have shiny hair and the prettiest eyes. So will you be my boyfriend?" She asked and stared at me with those greengreen eyes._

_I could feel my heart speeding up as the world around me slows down. Inside my head ran multiple conversations. Say yes! It's not like you have the guts to ask her out anyway. Say yes! You'll regret it if you didn't. Why are you staring at her like at an idiot?! She's waiting for your answer._

_"__Y-yes." I finally managed to mumble._

_"__Great! This would have been less fun if I were to ask anyone else."  
_

_What!? I felt as if the carpet was pulled from under me._

_"__Just kidding, Sasuke-kun." She teased._

_"__It would have been awkward if I kissed you if you weren't my boyfriend." She said and proceeded to plant one on me._

_She kissed me first! I felt my face heat up._

_"__Now I get to kiss you anytime." She teased me again. Only this time it felt more like a hint of things to come .  
_

_And oh! She definitely did._

_._

_._

_._

I know she loves me. She has told me many times and her actions let me know she does but I still wonder why.

.

.

.

_The guys ask me why I bother putting up with Sakura when I wasn't even getting any (according to Kiba) and when she was treating me like her personal roly poly (according to Shino) because I keep coming back up when pushed down. Sai postulates that I was a masochist and Sakura was a sadist (though that could not be far-fetched) and Shikamaru thinks the whole affair was just troublesome. The other guys like Neji, Lee and Chouji stay out of it.  
_

_Naruto was the only one supportive of us though he may be a bit biased since he was a close friend to both of us._

_But they wouldn't understand what it's like to love Sakura. As much as it was like a rollercoaster ride, the high was so worth it._

_I was the first one to say 'I love you'._

_We were 16. It has been a long time coming. I've been mulling over it since a year ago and may have even felt it for longer. _

_I was walking her home one winter afternoon, bundled up in our thick coats, scarves, beanies and boots. Her gloved hand was in mine and she was smiling talking about the start of the holidays and no classes. She might have been telling me the secrets of the universe and I would not have heard any of it because I was too busy looking at her and the snowflakes that would brush upon her rosy cheeks._

_"__Sasuke-kun?" She turned to ask me when we were in front of her house, seeing as I had been quiet._

_"__I love you." _

_She gasped as I felt her stiffen beside me._

_"__Sasuke-kun..."_

_"__You don't have to say anything. I just wanted you to know so now you know. Don't think like you owe me anything because you don't." I told her as to relieve her of feeling burdened by my confession._

_"__Thank you." She told me as she entered her home._

_The first time she told me she loved me was during New Year's._

_She was at our house celebrating and we were counting down the time to midnight. As the final seconds of the year ticked by she pulled me down and whispered 'I love you too' before she kissed me as the fireworks in my head exploded._

_The 2 years I waited was worth it._

_._

_._

_._

"Well, first, they can talk all they want but it would only matter if you let it. I've never wanted to be a prince nor a hero. I only ever wanted to be yours. Secondly, you don't have to worry because I'm only looking at you. My eyes only see you. When I look at you, everything else fades into the background. Lastly, you can blame my parents. I'm sure my mother would love to hear that." I told her.

Honestly, my mother is probably in love with her almost as much as me.

"Hmp. Mikoto would probably tell me it's why I should marry you because we're going to have the prettiest babies." She said sounding disgruntled.

"Would that be bad?" I asked, feeling hurt, because I was seriously thinking of her and our not so distant future and including her in my long term plans.

.

.

.

_The first and only time we seriously broke up was when we were 17._

_I learned that she was thinking about moving to Suna where they were offering her early entry to Suna University for their premed course. It wasn't even her who told me but Gaara._

_Gaara was a friend of hers in Suna who I've met once when he vacationed here. He happened to be on-line the same time I was and asked me how I was taking the news about Sakura's possible transfer to Suna for her studies. _

_I was blindsided by the news and Gaara apologized for accidentally spilling her secret and causing us problem._

_It was the first time I got really mad at Sakura. _

_When we met up that day at the park and she teased me about breaking up because I had a scowl on my face, I exploded with all my pent up grievances._

_"__Go ahead! Do it!" I challenged her._

_"__I was only kidding, Sasuke-kun." She said, alarmed. "What's wrong with you today?"_

_"__When were you going to tell me?" I asked her._

_It dawned on her what I was talking about and she looked guilty for a moment before her anger also broke out._

_"__It was my decision to make when I wanted to tell you."_

_"__Fine! Then find yourself another boyfriend because I'm done always trying to understand you! Find someone you can toy with when you want to!" I said and walked away. _

_I haven't made it very far when I heard her pitiful sobs. It broke my heart to hear her cry because the only time I saw her cry was when we were 12. _

_It was the first time she brought me to her house which seemed empty. I've never met any of her family so I asked her where they were. She told me about her family, how her father left them and how her mother was living with her new family. How she stayed with Gaara's family in Suna before she was adopted when she was 5 by Tsunade who was very nice but always busy at the hospital. _

_I ran back immediately to hold her in my arms._

_"__Y-you left." She sobbed against my chest._

_"__I'm sorry.I take it back. I won't do it ever again. Forgive me." I said, as I rubbed her back and kissed her hair._

_However tough Sakura appeared to be, I knew she wasn't. If there was one thing she feared the most it was being abandoned._

_And I was ever regretful I did it to her even for just a minute. Because finally I understood Sakura, she pushes people away to see if they would stay._

_Everytime we break-up and make-up, a niggling part of my brain asks 'what if she wants to break up with us again?' The answer was easy. I would let her because I only want to make her happy but if there was a chance that we could be together again then I would always take that chance._

_"__I love you, that won't ever change. When I told you I love you I meant it in a forever kind of way. I may be young but it doesn't mean I don't know how I feel. If you would break up with me after this, then I would understand. But if you'll still have me, I'll stay with you as long as you want me to be." I promised._

_ "__I believe you, Sasuke-kun. Let's just forget the last 15 minutes happened. I wanted to tell you but I didn't know how." _

_"__It's fine. Take all the time you need to think about it. I will support you whatever you decide on."_

_In the end, she didn't choose Suna. She said she always wanted to go to Konoha University anyway, which was Tsunade's alma mater. _

_And reading between the lines, I knew she chose me over Suna. It was the most important proof I have that she loved me even without her returning the words._

_._

_._

_._

"Do I look shallow to you, Sasuke-kun? If I were to marry you it would be because I love you and I see no point in living my life without you." She answered hotly.

"Okay." I acquiesced. There was no point prolonging this discussion. "So wanna go home now or maybe you want to stop by for some ice cream." I offered.

"Oooh! Ice cream! What are we waiting for?" She said excitedly and grabbed my arm hurriedly.

Because of Sakura, I have become good at deflection and distraction.

And of course the best thing after the break-up is the make-up sex. And as with everything with her, it's magnificent, glorious, incredible, and all the synonyms for amazing.

She still got me beat at everything. But I finally figured out what I was best at. I was best at loving Haruno Sakura.


End file.
